Stoner's Lap

1. When the smoker has been sitting while smoking and has accidentaly tipped ash upon their jeans. It is most prominent among cannabis smokers, hence the phrase "Stoner's Lap".

2. When one has been rolling or preparing cannabis smoking joints/devices and has spilled cannabis and tobbaco on their lap and have not brushed it off. Can also apply to cooking.

Smoker 1: Hey man what's up?

Smoker 2: Not much dude, just smoking a J and it's giving me hardcore stoner's lap.

Smoker 1: Aw man brush that crap off.

Smoker 2: No man, black jeans, it'll make it worse.

Smoker 1: Damn dude. I'm too stoned.

by JollySmoker July 26, 2010

Stoner Minute

A stoner minute is now officially 7 minutes. Within 7 minutes there are 420 seconds. Typically a stoner minute is used to have a nice session to yourself.

Joe: You coming over yet?

Jeremy: Give me a stoner minute, gotta finish up this shad

*7 minutes later*

Jeremy: ON MY WAY.!

by EyeJuan December 1, 2010

Stoner's Assist

A stoner's assist is when you're too high to smoke another bowl, and your bro helps you out by lighting it for you.

Bro, I'm too high to hit this.

Stoner's assist, bro. I got you.

by Duckyruzic February 17, 2012

stoner mace

When someone turns on the light after smoking out and it blinds you

Damn stoner mace man thanks

by phelonware September 20, 2015

Stoner the loner

A person who runs a drugs business better than the cartel but he has little to no friends

I got the weed from stoner the loner

by Summer.rivera November 29, 2016

stoner hour

when time slows down; it seems like hours have passed but it's only been minutes

"Hey bro what time is it?"
"1:49 why?"

"Wow we got here at 1:15 and it seems like it's been hours!"

"Yeah dude it's cause we're on Stoner Hour"

by Alevillaxa September 25, 2017

stoner toast

A delicious food made by cooking a bread product (or a similar delicacy such as Tostino's Pizza Rolls) in a toaster oven and topping it with a foodstufs that sounds good in theory but not always in practice.

Dude I got cheesy garlic bread and imitation lobstermeat in the freezer we gotta make stoner toast.

by Kevin M.D. November 11, 2017