wank barrier

The mystical and sometimes unobtainable 7 wank barrier......the point at which you cannot wank any further due to draining the wank bladder

" I got some hot new porn last night and tossed myself stupid.....Still couldn't get past the wank barrier though!"

"She's a barrier babe!"...I.E a lady of such beauty as to be worth 7 wanks.

by combatstig March 15, 2009

revision wank

When you get so bored of revision the only thing left to do is to have a wank.

A form of procrastination.

A: God revision is so boring

B: Have a revision wank

A: Great idea dude

by michelleandjoe December 11, 2011

wank paradox

Wanking whilst thinking about someone that's wanking whilst thinking about you wanking whilst...

Dude, I got stuck in a wank paradox with your dad last night

by Wirey Streak of Piss March 9, 2011

Service Wank

Having a wank just to 'clear the pipes' so to speak. Absolutely nothing to do with any sexual thoughts.

I was bored last night so had a service wank, it's been a few days and I didn't want to get clogged up

by laurafrobisher January 22, 2015

Wank Blackout

The act of masturbating in semi-erect mode and never reaching climax because one cannot decide upon a particular wank model. Also occurs if a series of past sexual images is constantly infiltrated by erotic memories best forgotten (i.e. gay experiments, big fat old birds, your best mate's ugly mum, etc.). May be linked to anxiety.

I was really in the mood for a wank the other night but when I got to the outdoor privvy I had a wank blackout.

by Fred Scurvy December 15, 2010

Chokey Wank

The act which results in a celebrity death as a result of a failed attempt at autoerotic asphyxia.

You know that Bill from Kill Bill died of a Chokey wank?

by Finnbarr March 7, 2010

Granny Wank

giving a girl a lick out when she has large fanny flaps

"Dude, i totally gave this girl a granny wank, the flaps were touching my ears."

by Plube09 January 1, 2009