carpet soldier

A man notoriously known to seek out lesbians and convert them into being straight by means of flirting, dating, and/or sex.

Guy 1: Dude, john is such a carpet soldier.
Guy 2: Well you got to give him credit, he's the only man I know who made a lesbian bar close down.

by Alkyd Norm February 27, 2017

junkies carpet

Two stoners sit in their living room for several weeks, smoking doobies and occasionally sampling other recreational drugs. Over time, the carpet will become coated in a layer of different drugs. Bagged and tagged, the pick and mix of junkies carpet is then sold at a low price. The perfect solution to a budget night out... Or night in

I've got a week till payday, looks like I'm on junkies carpet till then

by JohnnyHash January 29, 2019

Carpet Mafia

Another term for crabs/pubic lice

Below average girl: so we hooking up for tonight?

Average guy: sorry, I got carpet mafia.. not tonight.

by CharaChan July 10, 2021

carpet flash

When a girl flashes her pubes to another individual

When i was pulling down my pants, i accidentally carpet flashed my friend.

by daflashers April 1, 2015

carpet shower

an uncomfortable shower in a bathroom fully carpeted floors walls even the bathtub

guy 1 dude sorry i just got out of my carpet shower
guy 2 what!?

guy 1 i had my bathroom fully carpeted

guy 2 oh god

by minniladds December 3, 2019

Carpet Massage

When a man uses his hand(s) to please a woman.

Instead of a carpet munching tonight how about just a carpet massage?

A carpet massage a day keeps the bitch away

If you're not ski poling you're carpet massaging

by ldylumps October 19, 2012

Matching carpets

where pubic hairs are of same length or same cut as your head hairs

dammmnnn she was good in bed but she had matching carpets :/

by Niffer-fish January 17, 2009