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New cockin'

When an ex-girlfriend begins a new relationship.
I ran into Jennifer on the street the other day.' 'She new cockin'?' 'Yeah, I heard she is seeing some guy.
by calzon chino July 21, 2011
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YouTube News

"YouTube news" is another way of saying "old news" or "I already heard about it". If someone tells you something that you have already heard about, you can respond by saying "YouTube news".

This phrase communicates that, like news that spreads throughout the universe very quickly via YouTube, you have already heard about it. It takes 5 minutes for new news to mature into YouTube news (aka old news).

Thanks to YouTube (and texting), news gets old really fast. YouTube news is new news that is already old. However, YouTube news does not have to refer to things that are ACTUALLY on YouTube. "You Tube news" usually refers to things that only matter to you, your personal friends, and the fake friends you have on facebook.

HOW TO USE THE PHRASE:

You usually just say, "YouTube news" without any other words accompanying the phrase. The words "YouTube news" explain exactly what you mean all by themselves.

If it has been 5 minutes since an event, there is a 99.9% chance that EVERYONE who could possibly give a shit about it already knows every damn detail (thanks to texting). Consequentially, the phrase "It's been 5 minutes" can be used in conjunction with the phrase "YouTube news".
EXAMPLE 1:

MARY: Guess what! Johnny and I got engaged!

BILLY: YouTube news.

MARY: But he only proposed 5 minutes ago.

BILLY: Yeah, I know.

EXAMPLE 2:

JILL: You're never going to believe this: Heather's car broke down in the middle of the Siberian tundra and she almost froze to death.

BOBBY: YouTube news. It's been 5 minutes.

EXAMPLE 3:

MARK: Dude, I spilled my coffee on an old lady and she burned to death.

JOHN: It's been 5 minutes. Already heard about it.

MARK: Damn YouTube news.

EXAMPLE 4:

OSCAR: Hey man, you're never going to believe this! I got a call from... oh yeah, it's been 5 minutes. You already know about it.

JACK: Yeah, YouTube news.
by jackette55 July 23, 2011
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Chinese New Year

when a man ties 10 Fireworks to his genitals and sets them off
Keven Pirera loves to throw his nuts a Chinese new year
by Xero42 June 16, 2011
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new jersey lamppost

your by a lamppost,you unscrew the bulb and sick your dick in side and enjoy the electrical shock..........and live
man: hey man watch this (sticks dick in socket and lives)

friend: woah that was the new jersey lamppost
by boba joe boba joe June 23, 2011
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Taylor New

An unbelievably sexxy girl. She looks good enough to be a model and drives all the guys crazzzzyyy. She has bright blue eyes and an amazing body ;) She's also one of the most fun and craziest girls youll meet.
"Did you go to frightland land last night?"

"Yea i went with a Taylor New and it was amazing!"
by RiRi29 August 25, 2011
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Got the new sour ?

A saying that is used to ask someone if they have sucked someones dick.
Because semen tastes very very sour, and it's flavor is called "new sour".
How did your date go? Got the new sour ?
by Judge dredd7 September 10, 2011
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Boss, I have bad news

Henchman- Boss, I have bad news.
Five minutes later-
*repeated gunshots*
by A_Bum February 26, 2023
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