The Calendar Option 

A technique of temporarily “saving face” with colleagues, bosses, customers, and auditors by changing every calendar and clock in a particular workplace in an effort to cover up a missed deadline. “The Calendar Option” is the “Nuclear Option” of work place fault misdirection. “The Calendar Option” should only be used when the monumental task of changing dozens of calendars, clocks, and watches pales in comparison to actually completing ones assigned task on time. Hacking of local computer and cellular networks is usually preferred, as these sources represent the primary ways of determining dates and times. “The Calendar Option” will buy you enough time to prepare a resume, write a cover page, and apply for other jobs in the timespan prior to your superiors realizing you’ve elegantly gamed them to death. Worried about future employment? Don’t! One who can successfully employ “The Calendar Option” is often far under-employed anyway. This fact is clearly demonstrated as the time, energy, intelligence and sheer skill required to pull off the maneuver could be accomplished by no less than an American, tier 1, Special Forces operator who is also a Ninja.

Are you late? Can’t blame a colleague? Can’t blame your computer? Can’t blame the weather? Don’t even bother! Just employ “The Calendar Option” and you won’t need to blame a thing because the calendar and clocks say “you’re not late!”

late nuclear option option ninja bad employee blame

The Calendar Option by Darren Besert January 21, 2016

Rule of Oprah 

A rule that simply states that if the opportunity to consensually fornicate with a woman of utmost clout (e.g., Oprah) comes along, it is your civic duty to do so.

Nate: Dude…Janet Reno…Would ya?

Corey: Well, I guess I kinda have to since she’s technically Rule of Oprah.

Rule of Oprah by MasturNater December 17, 2021

Operation PROTECT 

A New Zealand (NZ) military operation established to support the New Zealand governments response to Covid 19. The operation was formed when it was discovered that other NZ government departments were completely incompetent, and entirely incapable of doing anything other than cashing their absorbently high pay checks for doing very little. The NZ military then spent approximately 2 years repeatedly correcting the ineptitude of these government departments and guiding them step by step through the simplest of tasks to ensure the containment of Covid 19. This operation was done in conjunction with maintaining all other NZ military outputs, therefore creating significant fatigue of military personnel. This resulted in excessive attrition of service personnel whom were both frustrated with the governments maladroitness, and the militaries senior leadership for their inability to defend their personnel; and instead were only focused on furthering their own careers.

Mate: So what is Operation PROTECT?

Other Mate: So bullshit to bail out the incompetence of the government.

Operation PROTECT by ThatsNotMyRealName2 October 18, 2021

Openwater Swimmer 

Wikipedia: Martin Soriano is a Philippine openwater swimmer from Ilonggo. He was the first person on record to swim the Guimaras-Iloilo Strait, a 7.7 km (4.2 nm) crossing accomplished on 7 August 1994, starting from the Buenavista Wharf in Guimaras to the Iloilo river wharf across the Iloilo Strait.

Martin Soriano is an Openwater Swimmer from the Philippines 1994

Openwater Swimmer by Cyclonetrading July 13, 2021

Operation PROTECT 

A New Zealand (NZ) military operation established to support the New Zealand governments response to Covid 19. The operation was formed when it was discovered that other NZ government departments were completely incompetent, and entirely incapable of doing anything other than cashing their absorbently high pay checks for doing very little. The NZ military then spent approximately 2 years repeatedly correcting the ineptitude of these government departments and guiding them step by step through the simplest of tasks to ensure the containment of Covid 19. This operation was done in conjunction with maintaining all other NZ military outputs, therefore creating significant fatigue of military personnel. This resulted in excessive attrition of service personnel whom were both frustrated with the governments maladroitness, and the militaries senior leadership for their inability to defend their personnel; and instead were only focused on furthering their own careers.

Mate: So what is Operation PROTECT?

Other mate: The protection of the governments reputation, so everyone doesn't discover they're utterly incompetent and couldn't plan a piss up in a brewery.

Operation PROTECT by ThatsNotMyRealName2 October 18, 2021

OPPA XL

OPPA is an emote used to express frustration with something, as you can probably guess with the man smashing his keyboard
why the emote is used is in reference to XL, which is the abbreviation of Xiangling
Xiangling is usually taken as the basis for analysing how good a character is when talking about damage output and ease of use
as such, she gets mentioned so much that even mentioning her name is enough to trigger genshin players and move them to anger
so OPPA XL is basically used when XL is mentioned
the word AGANE (the incorrect spelling of again) is also used in conjunction at times as it's used to refer to her being mentioned all the time

1010: "xiangling-"
entire genshin fandom: "OPPA XL AGANE"

OPPA XL by Bacobowl July 12, 2022

JungKook Oppa 

He's not your oppa

Army: JUNGKOOK OPPA
JUNGKOOK: I aM nOt yOuR oPpA

JungKook Oppa by jhgfrfgh June 17, 2019