callum salmon

muppet, nonce even.

that guy is such a callum salmon

by urmumisfruity January 9, 2022

Callum and Rachel

Together they are perfect and unstoppable

no matter what gets in their way it always works out

have you seen callum and rachel? they’re perfect!

by RK<3 March 24, 2022

Callum

Callum likes kids. He drinks Stella like it’s going out of fashion, in fact it’s the only fashion he has ever known. He has a crooked penis which leave women’s very wanting less. His face makes onion’s cry.

God that guy is such a Callum

by DaisyDuke101 March 6, 2021

Callum-posting

The chronic habit of posting painfully mundane, oddly specific, and questionably profound WhatsApp statuses that nobody asked for—but now we all have to live with.

Often includes:
• Food hot takes that sound like rejected Dragon’s Den pitches

• Daily life updates that feel like side quests from a preschool teacher

• Music screenshots with cryptic captions that don’t make sense but sound like they might if you were high
• Off-brand motivational quotes with the emotional depth of a soggy Rich Tea biscuit
• Photos of countryside or suburban nothingness with captions like “Needed this”

“Man acts like he’s the main character in a Netflix indie short every time he posts. Stop the Callum-posting”

“You know you’re Callum-posting when your status feels like a TED Talk but it’s just a tree and bad lighting.”

by Cally420 March 27, 2025

Callum

He is Megan’s boyfriend.

Megan: CALLUM’S MINE!!!!
Callum:I know lol

by Lolcakes.jk December 6, 2019

Callum

The type of guy that will do anything for a primal shotgun in Fortnite. Even murder his pets

Callum: GIVE ME PRIMAL SHOTGUN

Joe: SUCK MY DICK

Callum: *kills*

by CALLUMWANTSIT March 19, 2021

Callum

Callum is a truly amazing person, if you ever do get to meet them. A confident and kind person, who is lovely to spend time with and is someone whom you can get together with and have a nice time.

Friends: “Ladies watch out, Callum’s about!”

by Callum Wyatt April 6, 2021