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john

isn’t allowed to date until he’s 18, but considers you his girlfriend anyways. he makes you feel like the best girl in the world, then breaks your heart bc he cares more about his sport than he does about you. who knows, things may work out in the future though.
no john is the sweetest.

i hate john so much.
by ajtheblondie March 30, 2021
mugGet the johnmug.

Father John Misty

One of the best indie artist of all of the times, mahashmashana is his newest album to date, and his best (in my opinion fuck your opinion) is God's Favorite Customer
I have a big crush on Father John Misty
Father John Misty isn't that pedo priest from your church
by ThatGuyInAGasMask December 3, 2024
mugGet the Father John Mistymug.

John Lewis Teaspoon

The term to "John Lewis Teaspoon" someone is to go and purchase a brand new sparkly teaspoon from the local John Lewis store.
The spoon can only be purchased from a John Lewis store and cannot be from any other store.
Once purchased the purchaser uses the teaspoon to remove one eye from the targeted person using only the spoon. After the eye has been removed and only the socket remains, the person with the tea spoon has intercourse with the eye socket of the person lacking the eye.
Person 1 "Glen is such a pain in the arse"

Person 2 " Yeah, if he keeps it up I'm gonna John Lewis Teaspoon him"

Or

Person 1 "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO! IM GONNA JOHN LEWIS TEASPOON THE CRAP OUT OF YOU"

Person 2 "EEEEEK"
by 969-696 February 19, 2024
mugGet the John Lewis Teaspoonmug.

John moment

this is a term used by people for when someone, preferably by the name of John, says something or posts something that isn’t funny at all. that is when the term is used to show how unfunny your friend John is.
“dude, check this out!!”
*John shows something unfunny*
“wow, that’s an John moment.”
by Johnnotfunny2020 October 5, 2020
mugGet the John momentmug.

John

Most boring, fucking basic ass name
Person 1: Hey! What’s your name?
Person 2: John!
Person 1: oh fuck *walks away*
by Zxulh February 6, 2022
mugGet the Johnmug.

John Cornelius

You know when I first watched the polar express as a kid, I had a crush on John Cornelius
“What is wrong with you”
by FanOfPolarExpress31 October 9, 2023
mugGet the John Corneliusmug.

John

John is a pear which makes him very fruity, make sure to play CPR around him to make him put his hand over his mouth and maybe he would sing CPR with you ( the song by CUPCAKKE )
by JOHNPHOBIC November 20, 2021
mugGet the Johnmug.

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