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Johnson Beard

Pubic hair that has grown longer than one's right thumb.
Dude, my Johnson beard looks like the Amazon jungle during the summer
by Mr. handfart January 10, 2011
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Ear Beard

When the hair in a man's (or woman's) ear becomes so coarse and bountiful, that it resembles a normal facial beard. It needs constant grooming and trimming.
Praful's ear beard has gotten so out of control that you can no longer see his ear, only the hair that covers it. Praful shaves it monthly, but his ear beard 5 o'clock shadow is apparent by the next day.
by Taterbutthole October 26, 2010
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Pre-Bearding

To prepare the face/existing facial hair for future beardage
"Dude, are you doing no-shave November?" "Yeah man, but I've got to do some pre-bearding on this goatee first."

"Are you trying to grow a beard?" "Why yes I am, but first I have to pre-beard this part because it takes forever to get long."
by thebeardmeister September 23, 2011
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Vaginal Beard

when female reproductive organs contain so much hair that if you cut it all off you could glue it to a viking's face and it would pass as a normal beard.
That sally girl got her vaginal beard all in my teeth!
by Johnny Cock-knocker June 17, 2012
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Fecal Beard

When someone doesn't wash their hands after pooping and then puts their hands on your face.
Sally, please don't rub the stubble on my face if you haven't washed your hands after going #2, because you've now given me a fecal beard and I have to disinfect my face.
by jennacola March 8, 2013
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catnip beard

A man's beard that is so attractive women (or men) cannot control their impulse to touch, stroke, or rub themselves against it, similar to how cats find catnip irresistible.
Foley's got a real catnip beard; whenever I see him I just can't keep my hands off of it!
by figurista June 7, 2014
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Dragon-Beard

A sad, wilted foreskin, caused by having too little of your foreskin removed at birth, resembling that of a dragons beard depicted in ancient Japanese paintings.
Dude, how long has it been since you've scrubbed that dick jacket? That dragon-beard's so stanky i can smell it from the kitchen.
by TheRealFrankieMuniz December 24, 2016
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