flying spider monkey

A crusty old teacher, usually Scottish, who's got bad breath and grades essays hard.
Jesus Tapdancing Christ, Mr. Feeny is a fucking flying spider monkey.
by The Dude's a Pederast December 22, 2007
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spanking the angry monkey

another term used to say matursbate.
"I just got done spanking the angry monkey."
by freshswagg February 28, 2010
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Yellow Monkey Squeezin’s

“Even though I love the taste, I am allergic to Yellow Monkey Squeezin’s.”
by RahsaanVoriel January 02, 2021
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Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey

It is said that the Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey is the only thing in existence that can survive a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris. This creature dwells in the deepest areas of the amazon rainforest feasting on various fruits and plants. Standing 12 feet tall and armed with an arsenal of pirate weapons and ninja skills it is quite simply the most deadly animal on the planet.

*WARNING*

Stay away, extremely dangerous DO NOT APPROACH under any circumstances
None available, nobody has ever been near the Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey and survived.

Purple Pirate Ninja Monkey Death Sword Shuriken Amazon Chuck Norris Chuck Norris
by Genuine Chocolate Face December 21, 2010
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south paw monkey spanker

One who uses his left hand to jack, whack, choke the chicken, spank the monkey, attack the one-eyed purple-headed warrior or in other words, MASTURBATE!

A lefty, per say

May be a person that writes, hits, or even smokes with his right hand but gallops the old lizzard with his left hand.

Also referred to as an S.P.M.P.
Kristine: So I used my teloscope last night and looked into Ray's window. Did you know that he is a South Paw Monkey Spanker?

Derek: So I applied for this new job at the Home Depot, and my boss wanted to know if I was an S.P.M.P. and I'm all wtf? On occasion, though, I do, do the five kunckle shuffle with 'ol Lefty!

Janet: Hey Bobby?
Bobby: Yes Janet?
Janet: Do you participate in genital stimulation via phallengetic motion with your left hand?
Bobby: Why yes, I am an S.P.M.P.!
by Emas Diez April 28, 2006
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A new rare breed of monkey that is born with hair and completely loses it by adulthood. This new species is found in the hollers of Tennessee. Also this monkey is known for its insatiable sexual appetite
The alopecian appalacian ridgeback monkey got extremely wet during the storm because it had not hair with which to keep itself dry.
by MichelleF1973 June 08, 2005
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Citizen of the USofA. A septic.
I think maybe we should attack Iran.
You would you burger eating invasion monkey.
by paddy ram rod January 08, 2008
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