Big John

Someone who constantly one ups you, no matter how ridiculous the statement.

"My grandfather has an incredible hat collection. He has 742 hats!"

"That's nothing. I have *743* hats!"

"You're just Big Johnning me."

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"I used to do ballet when I was little."

(A 400 pound morbidly obese person) "I starred in Swan Lake!"

"Yeah, OK Big John."

by Wolfy6688 April 4, 2016

John Mercieca

Small peen ;/, veins, 6 pack and best friend zac niko <3

Look its the faglord, John Mercieca. What a fairy

by Noongarnator October 29, 2020

John Shea Method

Do whatever you want, but it must work

I used the John Shea Method to pass my test.

by The Beast (The Real One) October 20, 2021

John paul Queef

When you are listening to Led Zeppelin and you queef out of your coochius Maximus

Omg! Chloe I just John Paul Queefed out of my pussy lips while cranking my hawg to Custard pie by Led Zeppelin

by John Paul Queef June 27, 2024

John

John’s are typically around 5’8 with curly blonde hair, they are compulsive liars, addicted to smoking weed and vaping, they can be critical and a bit of an asshole. John juniors are especially the worst, they typically enjoy wearing crocs, enjoys looking at men over women, usually they have green and gold eyes (hazel)

You’re getting on my nerves, quit being a John.

by #1 John hater December 2, 2023

Pulling a John

Drinking five tall rum and cokes and beating a member of your immediate family.

"I heard R-Kelly pulled a John last week" "If you try to make me go back to rehab imma pull a John on all ya'll motherfuckers" "on god im Pulling a John this weekend"

by CouchCreamerVance October 6, 2025

John

Nonsensical euphemism for any noun (usually a penis,) often used jokingly or to self-censor in public.

1: "DUUUUDE! I hit my fucking John!"
2: "What?"
1: "MY JOHN! IT HIT ME RIGHT IN THE JOHN!"
2: "Travis, what the hell are you talking about?"

by Torrajin October 23, 2022