Crusty Guard

When one ejaculates a significant enough quantity within their pants so as to build up a thick shell around their junk that acts as a biodegradable, homemade, and shock-resistant cup.

"Ah man, I was horny before the big lacrosse match so I built up a nice ol' crusty guard."

by anonymous March 29, 2015

Crusty Keith

After having anal sex with an old woman, she shits on your dick and then sucks it off. (Not to be confused with the Moist Keith when its a young woman.)

Eric: Dude, your mom's breath smells like shit!

Thomas: Yeah I know, she just gave my dad a Crusty Keith.

by hobojoe017 December 3, 2011

crusty tampon

Crusty tampon is that thing where your vaginal is so infected it boogers up and closes like an eyeball with pinkeye.
Usually there will be a tampon in there too, string hanging out.

Crusty tampon can also mean just a dirty old bloody tampon clinging to a bathroom ceiling for six months.

"Ooooh, my cooter is in distress, done got me a case of the ol crusty tampon."

by DrunkrFastr April 6, 2016

crusty keyboard

A crusty keyboard is a person who has terrible hygiene and is a total pushover. If you meet a crusty keyboard turn around and run. The eye boogers just ain't worth it.

Yeah that kid Shane is such a crusty keyboard

by everyotherday88 May 8, 2019

eye crusty

The little boogers that form in the corners of your eyes. Most commonly referred to as 'eye boogers' but 'eye crusty' is used by the most coolest people.

"Wipe that eye crusty off your face, it's gross!"

by ROASTBEEF_12 December 22, 2018

Crusty Snatch

Crusty being, well crusty...bread crumbs sticking to the thiccc thighs, and snatch being another word for pussy (vagina).

That girl had a damn thick crusty snatch on her

by CatFeces_Burglar January 3, 2019

Crusty Sleeve

When your best boy pisses you off so you go into his room when he's not home and you nut all his tube socks so they form a white crusty nasty looking ass sleeve that can't Flex for nothing so he can't wear them looking like drywall looking asses

"Boy, you pissed me the fuck off you better not leave your house or I'm going to give you some crusty sleeves."

by BigDiddyWillie May 23, 2018