Mean Man Syndrome

When a man must act mean at all times to feel good about himself. He probably has an uncircumcised penis and is self conscious in crowds.

Do you know that guy Peter? You know, the guy with mean man syndrome who always says mean things and is kind of ugly and tall?

by Drwifey2005 October 9, 2015

Slippery Ass Syndrome

When your asshole gets wet and brown after a few hours of not wiping fully.

“I was walking around today at work with a slippery asshole.”

I went to the bathroom to wipe and that shit came out brown and yellow aF.

I got slippery ass syndrome

by Ehnnrey June 19, 2018

Phantom Menace Syndrome

A delayed reaction of disappointment, potentially towards any work of art or entertainment. Having a positive appraisal of a song, or a book, or a movie or TV show (for example) that gradually decays into a negative appraisal after some casual consideration.
A common response to having high expectations that are unmet, towards an artist or intellectual property that one is subjectively fond of.

"I really enjoyed the last episode of Game of Thrones at the time, but after thinking about it for a couple of days it gave me a case of Phantom Menace Syndrome..."

by Large Wooden Badger July 9, 2019

sad whore syndrome

state in which you don’t give a fuck about anything and you are sad but you can’t cry because you can’t feel anymore. state which you can’t talk about with your parents because they will COME at you. state in which you are sad but you can’t feel anything and you can’t understand yourself and you hate everybody. you don’t want anyone to know what you are feeling. often said as SWS

You: “HEY”

Me: “hello. don’t talk to me i have sad whore syndrome leave me alone, bye

by SwS123tiktok January 15, 2020

phantom cellphone syndrome

Occasionally feeling as if you can hear your cellphone ringtone or feel it vibrating in your pocket when you don't have it on you or it's not within earshot or no one has called or texted you.

I felt my cell vibrating in my pocket, but when I reached in there to grab it, it wasn't even on my. Just phantom cellphone syndrome, I guess.

by rstarr2713 July 26, 2009

Reading Light Syndrome

A debilitating sensorimotor effect commonly experienced by a hyperaware male as a result of a self-inflicted obsession with headboard reading lights that point downward at the female in missionary position during intercourse, whereby the inept man progressively looses his little soft erection and proceeds to pseudonavigate his very impotence by projecting blame on the hanging bulbs that resemble dinking male sexual organs, and by releasing a timed laughter in order to appear in control of his embarrassing limpness

- R: Haha darlin'.. Looks like them LED bulbs want to get in on the action!! Silly me. Sorry. I'm funny.
- N: Shut up. Don't stop. Get it up.
- R: Oh but it's not me. It's never me. It's the Reading Light Syndrome. Like mama says.
- N: Ugh. You just go ahead and read with your dick lights. I'll call you.

by Nanochka August 18, 2021

concussive narwhal syndrome

*concussive narwhal syndrome (n.) - { sydromius concussive narwhalius } the result of getting into boxing match with a narwhal and getting hit, resulting in a severe concussion. followed by narwhal syndrome which can cause the victim to rapidly turn into a narwhal and/or the following:

bruises, sores, headaches, blisters, temporary blindness, diabetes, hearing loss, concussions, acne, congestion, deepening of the voice, impairment, lung cancer, OCD, alektorophobia, Mexico, racism, fever, rapid change in skin color, stupid, brain aneurysms, ADHD, insomnia, binge eating, bipolar depression, color blindness, pregnancy, Jake from state farm, dementia, hallucinations, household object eating disorder, heart failure, t-rex disease, lactose intolerance, obesity, swelling, standing on walls, high cholesterol, claustrophobia, compulsive cannabilism, Canada, phobophobia, chronic liver failure, dyslexia, back pain, asthma, COPD, pollen allergies, corpse husband, PTSD, black plague, hysteria, carbon monoxide poisoning, genesis, rapid change in race, hanahaki disease, chronic shrinking, autism, bioterorism, couch potato syndrome, dad went to get milk disorder, death, armageddon, disbelief in narwhals, etc.

* this is not real

UPDATE on concussive narwhal syndrome study: it causes everything, you can't hide. you have it. your mom has it. your dog has it. the weed in your front yard has it.

narwhals rule over us

gabby: " yea, my dad doesn't believe in narwhals"
riley: "oh- he must have concussive narwhal syndrome"

by gawrmochiii September 13, 2022