Standard Time

The sense of time we used to experience, as we tried and failed to reclaim it on November 1, 2020.

She awoke on November 1, 2020, eight months into Covid world, four years in the Trumpian alternative universe, and found herself trying to name the daze of the week, wondering how many of them until November 3, 2020, when something or nothing might change, maybe a few months or hours, who could say, and was reminded that she was back on Standard Time. It sounded so nice. She was sure it used to mean something...

by Monkey's Dad November 1, 2020

The Chair Standard

The amount of time it takes for gently used office chairs to be spoken for after an email is sent to accounting office staff announcing the chairs are available for exchange. Approximately 15 minutes per dozen chairs. Krispy Kreme donut standard is 1 hour per dozen.

The Krispy Kreme donuts don't meet the Chair standard.

by Athos2 November 10, 2021

Double standard

When someone lives to excess and has nothing but expanding dollar signs/becoming powerful (in real estate or new development, for example) on their mind, but also wants to wrap their tentacles around conservation efforts and humanitarian causes (such as social justice, income equality, sustainable energy, and a bunch of other issues they don't even hold sacred) to cover their tracks (and get credited for positive things) in case anybody questions (or stands up to) them.

The dorky bubbly girl claming to be a humanitarian and conservationist was one of the main reasons a lot of trees were missing, but she was too busy poking fun at other people's double standards to notice her own. She thought that humans were too responsible for global warming because she thought everyone else was trying to dominate or control the world's resources to the extent (excesses) that she was. She was arrogant enough to believe humans caused the last ice age, and that they were the sole reason for global warming, and the worst thing about somebody like her was that she didn't know it, she only saw arrogance in other people, which is the worst kind of arrogance, complete and total narcissism (the kind of narcissism that also only sees narcissism in others). The planet wasn't going to miss her when she was no longer a part of it and it's problems, but she would never see that either, because she had convinced the planet and the people living on it that they somehow needed her.

by The Original Agahnim November 23, 2021

APR-01 Standard

RFC APR-01 is the updated TCP communication standard used for 3WHS and is only available Annually on April 1st

Bro, the APR-01 standard has my tcpdump looking lit af

by twisty-networking May 18, 2018

The Appalachian standard

Ap·pa·la·chian (noun)
\ˌa-pə-ˈlā-ch(ē-)ən, -ˈla-, -sh(ē-)ən\
a native or resident of the Appalachian mountain area

The Appalachian Standard is a sexual position in which a male homosapien has a female in the standard missionary position while having her large breast in the headlock.

As he thrusted his purple headed warrior into her quirvering mound of love pudding; he carefully positioned himself to conquer her large breast in the The Appalachian standard sexual position.

by JayT.P a.k.a frognuts November 25, 2011

Standard

When someone is good looking, but not EXTREMELY attractive.

"Did Jonny break up with his girlfriend?"

"Yeah, he said she wasn't pretty enough for him."

" Are you kidding me? She's gorgeous, he's just standard."

by FACE0217 October 6, 2016

the standard

beomgyu

"Beomgyu is the standard."

by beomgyusnovia December 8, 2021