squat cobbler

When a fully clothed man in a costume sits on a pie and wiggles around in it

Dan: What kind of pie do squat cobblers use?
Jimmy: I don't know. Peach, banana cream, not really my area of expertise.

by PatrickMcElephant August 30, 2016

squat cobbler

The sexual act of one sitting in a pie, and wiggling around whilst crying.

"I'm feeling a little kinky tonight. I think I'll watch some squat cobbler"

by optimisticdingo September 1, 2016

squat cobbler

The act of sitting on pies while fully clothed or mooning the pie. Usual to the sexual pleaser of fetishers through the internet. Defined on the AMC TV show "Better Call Saul".

Man, you here Paul likes to do squat cobbler videos online? Who sells him those pies?

by darkdragonmc August 28, 2016

squat cobbler

The fetish act performed by a nude male, or female squatting their gentitalia into a pie and wiggling. Also known as Boston Creme Splat, Double moon moon pie, and Dutch Apple Ass. Coined by Saul Goodman in 'Better Call Saul'.

The art patron purchased videos from the man doing a squat cobbler.

by bettercall August 21, 2016

Squat Cobbler

Noun. When a pie is desecrated by bare human buttocks. Situation made worse when said human is crying

He has a private video stash of himself doing crying squat cobbler for another man.

by SquigglySquid September 3, 2016

Squat cobbler

Fetish whereas sexual gratification is achieved by sitting on pies and or pastries. Cream pies and meringues are the most commonly used for safety reasons.

Kim:What's your turn on baby?
Sal: I'm a squat cobbler.
Kim: That's hot. Let me get you a French Silk pie.

by Clive Bixby September 3, 2016

squat cobbler

A fetish that involves a man who sits in a pie and "wiggles around."

I had a very nice apple pie cooling on the window sill but, instead of Yogi Bear, the creepy neighbor Jerry got it. He's a squat cobbler.

by Wormald August 5, 2016