Torontosis

Torontosis (pronunciation: tor-on-TO-sis) A common condition usually caught from extended time periods spent in the Toronto area. It usually goes unnoticed in Toronto because it is so endemic to the area it is often overlooked. Characterized by extremist views and behaviours which annoy and set them apart from the wider community.

Symptoms vary but often include:

1. Overwhelming need to natter on about their overly-specific interest area. Re-directs or relates all conversation back to their fixation.

2. Driving non-infected persons away with a condescending attitude/cult-like zeal/boring endless talk on one subject.

3. Annoyance at anyone who does not know the detailed minutia of, or enjoy their over-specific interests.

4. Extreme dietary restrictions.

5. Condescending attitude towards anyone who enjoys mainstream art, music, products, or alignment with a political party that currently has elected members in government.

6. Only willing to eat/buy products that follow an unreasonably narrow moral guideline.

7. Are incapable of controlling their need to berate others about how immorally they live their lives.

Treatment:

The only known treatment for Torontosis is to spend significant amounts of time away from their tiny community of people who share their worldview. Time in smaller cities or the countryside is best. Torontosis is one strain of a disease that plague other major cities, such as NewYorkosis, Londonitis, Seattle Syndrome, and Vancoveriasis.

You can safely diagnose a case of Torontosis in the following cases:

1 and 2. "Yeah, you know, your situation with your roommmate reminds me of the political situation of Ukraine in 1918"

3. "Is that a Nicki Minaj CD? Sorry could you turn it off, I only listen to minimalist techno or drum-and-bass made in london between 1994 and 1997."

"Sorry, I can't go see a movie with you this week, waay too busy organizing...hey, do you want to come to our Reproductive Justice Slam Poetry Fundraiser?"

4. "You don't have any gluten-free bagels? Next you're going to tell me your only non-dairy creamer option is soy!!"

5. "I don't understand how you can support the NDP, they're capitalist traitors to the people's cause!!"

6. "I only wear clothes that I wove myself, from organic cotton, or were made by a commune in nepal from yaks hair."

7. "I can't believe you would consider using a choke chain on your 200 lb. Mastiff. How would YOU like a choke collar, you twisted westboro baptist nazi??"

by Caralain13 November 23, 2011

Toronto, Ontario

Home to 2 million people, it's Ontario's capital and has the highest population, and attractions are the CN tower and Yonge street buildings.

Toronto, Ontario, is Canada's biggest city.

by The Canadian Textbook September 13, 2017

tortonto

Canadian taco made by the old el Paso branch in Toronto. Developed by a Ryerson student, when she experienced a grammar error in her writing.

Hey can you pass me a tortonto

by Tortontoman November 28, 2013

Toronto scale

Scale of 1-10 defining the urgency of the need to urinate. This is an exponential scale, meaning the further you progress through the scale the faster the denominations increase. This frequently occurs when travelling into Canada's largest city by car at rush hour.

1 - Not needed
2 - Slight sensation the in the back of the mind
3 - Hmmm, think i have 30mins
4 - Ok, might need to go soon
5 - T-Minus 20 mins
6 - Ok seriously where did the last 10 minutes go
7 - Shit 4 minutes
8 - Ok guys this isn't funny
9 - Fuck there's no way out
10 - Acceptance...anyone got a towel

--Hey Man, I think i need a piss

--How bad is it?

--About a 7 on the Toronto scale

--Oh shit, we've got 4 minutes!!!

by Number17 June 21, 2014

Toronto Soufflé

When you're going down on your boyfriend when he's watching hockey and use maple syrup as lube. His pubes get wet so you have to blow-dry them but they catch on fire, so he has to run out into the snow to put it out.

A: Hey gurl, what did you do last night?
B: I gave Ed a Toronto Soufflé

A: OMG is okay?!
B: he is now, we spent 3hrs in A&E though.

by Andthenonetime69 February 2, 2017

Toronto invite

To NOT make a polite, formal, or friendly request to (someone) to go somewhere or to do something.

( antonymous to "invite" )

I got the toronto invite to that party, I can only imagine it was a bunch of Torontonians talking over each other, so probably didn't miss much.

by pzeudonympho May 30, 2018

toronteo=

a sad misspell of toronto

toronteo=

by Choleo March 10, 2022