Torontosis (pronunciation: tor-on-TO-sis) A common condition usually caught from extended time periods spent in the Toronto area. It usually goes unnoticed in Toronto because it is so endemic to the area it is often overlooked. Characterized by extremist views and behaviours which annoy and set them apart from the wider community.
Symptoms vary but often include:
1. Overwhelming need to natter on about their overly-specific interest area. Re-directs or relates all conversation back to their fixation.
2. Driving non-infected persons away with a condescending attitude/cult-like zeal/boring endless talk on one subject.
3. Annoyance at anyone who does not know the detailed minutia of, or enjoy their over-specific interests.
4. Extreme dietary restrictions.
5. Condescending attitude towards anyone who enjoys mainstream art, music, products, or alignment with a political party that currently has elected members in government.
6. Only willing to eat/buy products that follow an unreasonably narrow moral guideline.
7. Are incapable of controlling their need to berate others about how immorally they live their lives.
Treatment:
The only known treatment for Torontosis is to spend significant amounts of time away from their tiny community of people who share their worldview. Time in smaller cities or the countryside is best. Torontosis is one strain of a disease that plague other major cities, such as NewYorkosis, Londonitis, Seattle Syndrome, and Vancoveriasis.
Symptoms vary but often include:
1. Overwhelming need to natter on about their overly-specific interest area. Re-directs or relates all conversation back to their fixation.
2. Driving non-infected persons away with a condescending attitude/cult-like zeal/boring endless talk on one subject.
3. Annoyance at anyone who does not know the detailed minutia of, or enjoy their over-specific interests.
4. Extreme dietary restrictions.
5. Condescending attitude towards anyone who enjoys mainstream art, music, products, or alignment with a political party that currently has elected members in government.
6. Only willing to eat/buy products that follow an unreasonably narrow moral guideline.
7. Are incapable of controlling their need to berate others about how immorally they live their lives.
Treatment:
The only known treatment for Torontosis is to spend significant amounts of time away from their tiny community of people who share their worldview. Time in smaller cities or the countryside is best. Torontosis is one strain of a disease that plague other major cities, such as NewYorkosis, Londonitis, Seattle Syndrome, and Vancoveriasis.
You can safely diagnose a case of Torontosis in the following cases:
1 and 2. "Yeah, you know, your situation with your roommmate reminds me of the political situation of Ukraine in 1918"
3. "Is that a Nicki Minaj CD? Sorry could you turn it off, I only listen to minimalist techno or drum-and-bass made in london between 1994 and 1997."
"Sorry, I can't go see a movie with you this week, waay too busy organizing...hey, do you want to come to our Reproductive Justice Slam Poetry Fundraiser?"
4. "You don't have any gluten-free bagels? Next you're going to tell me your only non-dairy creamer option is soy!!"
5. "I don't understand how you can support the NDP, they're capitalist traitors to the people's cause!!"
6. "I only wear clothes that I wove myself, from organic cotton, or were made by a commune in nepal from yaks hair."
7. "I can't believe you would consider using a choke chain on your 200 lb. Mastiff. How would YOU like a choke collar, you twisted westboro baptist nazi??"
1 and 2. "Yeah, you know, your situation with your roommmate reminds me of the political situation of Ukraine in 1918"
3. "Is that a Nicki Minaj CD? Sorry could you turn it off, I only listen to minimalist techno or drum-and-bass made in london between 1994 and 1997."
"Sorry, I can't go see a movie with you this week, waay too busy organizing...hey, do you want to come to our Reproductive Justice Slam Poetry Fundraiser?"
4. "You don't have any gluten-free bagels? Next you're going to tell me your only non-dairy creamer option is soy!!"
5. "I don't understand how you can support the NDP, they're capitalist traitors to the people's cause!!"
6. "I only wear clothes that I wove myself, from organic cotton, or were made by a commune in nepal from yaks hair."
7. "I can't believe you would consider using a choke chain on your 200 lb. Mastiff. How would YOU like a choke collar, you twisted westboro baptist nazi??"
by Caralain13 November 23, 2011
Get the Torontosis mug.When someone asks where you live and you don’t live in Toronto (you live near it), but they won’t know what you’re talking about if you tell them the truth.
by httpuni July 31, 2018
Get the torontoish mug.Related Words
A person that was born or lived/lives in Toronto or have spent a large part or formative of their career in that city Toronto,Ontario,Canada (Ter-ron-tone-ee-in)
Similar to the term Canadian.
Toronto is the largest city in all of Canada.
Other Terms/Nicknames for Toronto Are:
T-Dot; T.O; Hogtown; The Big Smoke; Toronto the good
Similar to the term Canadian.
Toronto is the largest city in all of Canada.
Other Terms/Nicknames for Toronto Are:
T-Dot; T.O; Hogtown; The Big Smoke; Toronto the good
by Shiimersz March 24, 2008
Get the Torontonian mug.While often misunderstood by fellow Canadians as someone who pretends to occupy the center of the universe, upon visiting this fair city these misguieded compatriots find themselves compelled to admit that the Torontonian actually does.
A native inhabitant of the northwestern shore of Lake Ontario, the Torontonian has also been known to inhabit snowy hills and wooded climbs...and to lament the abysmal record of one of the most poorly managed professional hockey teams of all time.
by Ron Kuipers May 22, 2006
Get the torontonian mug.When you're in Toronto and your friend asks you how Toronto is you respond with "It's Torontotastic!"
by Melinda Mayham July 14, 2009
Get the Torontotastic mug.Insufferably arrogant people who consider themselves and their city (Toronto, Ontario) God's gift to Canada and the universe. Though universally hated by Canadians from every other part of the county for the past several decades, it never occurs to Torontonians that there might be a reason for all the resentment. Torontonians are incapable of considering anyone else's point of view except for their own, yet strangely label everyone else "intolerant". They also believe they speak for all Canadians on all matters, even though their viewpoints typically have no relation to practicality, reason or even reality.
Dick: John and Mary are typical Torontonians.
Jane: So are John and Mary complete assholes?
Dick: I believe I already answered that question, Jane.
Jane: So are John and Mary complete assholes?
Dick: I believe I already answered that question, Jane.
by JaneySnow June 18, 2011
Get the torontonians mug.A Toronto-specific word, as in when Torontonians stand around idly on their porches, sidewalks, tiny lawns, etc. and eyeball others who may not be like them, and when a non-Torontonian is suspected, squint their beady eyes and scrunch their weasel noses and point and open their mouths to utter an inaudible to humans scream – to alert other lurky Torontonians that someone unlike them is near; similar to the Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
I was passing through Riverdale last week when I noticed several lurky Torontonians staring at me, and when I paused, they all pointed and opened their mouths to utter some kind of weird noise.
by Carl Davidson November 26, 2019
Get the Lurky Torontonian mug.