Reading the Wallet

Taking a dump in the bathroom at work. Usually you have nothing to do while taking that dump. So you pull out your wallet and start to read it to pass the time.

Shelia: Where's Jason

Christian: He is reading the wallet!

Hey Dan that Cuban food went right through me. I have to go read the Wallet.

by Huge Murph February 24, 2009

Burn After Reading

Burn After Reading.

a term meaning to burn any documents or written evidence after reading them, which can jeopardize an individual or a party if not burnt and disposed of properly.

"ok these are documents belonging to some higher up what do we do with them?"
"burn them after reading"
'" are you sure?"
"yes burn after reading."

by kep john August 10, 2016

Extemp. Reading

The only category of Speech where it is appropriate to read out of a book. Usually others define it as a boring category, but they are wrong. You are given the chance to draw out of envelope, sneak a cutting back in and draw another, then practice for a half an hour before speaking to an old lady or hot college guy in a storage room or closet. Comparable to Storytelling, but not as loud, scary, or goofy.

Did you see that person talking to that wall?" "Oh, no worries, they're in Extemp. Reading!

by Mynameis? March 21, 2011

Reading Off The Pubes

When a girl is "Reading Off The Pubes", she is sucking on your dick, while simultaneously texting on one of those QWERTY keyboard cell phones. This gives the initial impression that the girl is Reading your pubes like a book.

Although there is some speculation because from the man's point of view, it simply looks like she is, in fact, texting. But the term merely mocks what the girl doing, because texting on a cell phone while giving a blow job is just plain slutty.

Man: Oh god, my girlfriend was sucking my dick, and I look down, and she's reading off the pubes! fucking bitch

Jessica: watchu up 2 tonite?
Veronica: Aw same old shit, just reading off the pubes right now though

by kliider August 29, 2008

Reading FC

Football Club formed in 1871, playing at different locations until 1896 when they moved to Elm Park.

Moved to the Madejski Stadium in 1998.

Playing in the Premiership for the first time in their history and are lightly to win the whole thing then take Europe next season.

Super Reading,
Super Reading FC,
We are by far the Greatest team,
The world has ever seen.

by VancouverDrew August 23, 2006

Rearing Unicorn

Where a couple starts having sex in the classic doggy position; then when he is ready to spit seed, he dismounts, leaps onto the woman's head and shoots for distance as she rears up.

Last night I performed the Rearing Unicorn on my wife.

by Prometheus69 December 18, 2010

Reading Rainbowed

How to reading rainbow someone: Tell the person that you’re speaking with something interesting to the point where they are genuinely interested in the topic. When you reach the point where you think the person is most interested in what you have to say and asks you a question about the topic, respond by saying “Read the damn book…ba da da.” (3 note tune that is played in the actual show when a kid would give a book report and cut you off mid-story leaving you in serious suspense). Then inform them that they just got reading rainbowed. You can switch it up and when someone doesn’t believe what you’re telling them; respond by saying “But you don’t have to take my word for it, read the damn book…ba da da."

Tom: Did you know that it’s possible to slow down time when you’re traveling at the speed of light?
Mike: No way, that’s not even possible.
Tom: Yes it is, there have been a lot of studies done on it.
Mike: Wow, how did they figure that out?
Tom: Read the damn book son…ba da da.
Mike: Huh?
Tom: You just got reading rainbowed.

by 13th May 7, 2011