Friend: Ew did u just take a piss and not wash your hands
Me: No I just did no hands mommy
Friend: What that
Me: When you don't touch your penis when u take a piss
Friend: OOOOOHHHHH okay, let me try
Me: No I just did no hands mommy
Friend: What that
Me: When you don't touch your penis when u take a piss
Friend: OOOOOHHHHH okay, let me try
by XxHeY_FrIeNdzXx September 8, 2016

by DJPTRSN January 18, 2012

When someone uses different hands for different tasks, instead of the same dominant hand for everything.
I’m not ambidextrous, I’m switch-handed — I write with my left hand but shoot basketballs with my right
by Andy the sim September 4, 2025

Andrea: Where did Mary get that purse? I though Brena was the one with a sugar daddy...
Jess: Yeah, but Brena is always passing along the gifts and taking friends on free trips. It's second-hand sugar.
Jess: Yeah, but Brena is always passing along the gifts and taking friends on free trips. It's second-hand sugar.
by aep90 September 10, 2020

An I.T. wizard's doer of his/her bidding in the context of getting things done without the need to engage with the great unwashed masses.
No need to ever go out, between Amazon, Uber Eats and my trusty monkey hand, I don't need to go anywhere til the next Brony meet.
by Buttwaddington November 22, 2021

Similar to the penis tuck. The swift tuck you do with your left (or non-dominant hand, leaving dominant hand to shake hands) when you're in public, standing up and have a visible erection.
Typically, thumb (under clothes) at the base of the erect penis and fingers at the head of the penis (over clothes). Then, push wrist down and fingers up. This results in the penis being tucked under the elastic strap of briefs or any such equivalent.
When done in one swift movement (that takes years to master) it appears that you are simply adjusting your pants/getting comfortable/scratching. This can be embarrassing but is better than the visibly erect alternative.
Typically, thumb (under clothes) at the base of the erect penis and fingers at the head of the penis (over clothes). Then, push wrist down and fingers up. This results in the penis being tucked under the elastic strap of briefs or any such equivalent.
When done in one swift movement (that takes years to master) it appears that you are simply adjusting your pants/getting comfortable/scratching. This can be embarrassing but is better than the visibly erect alternative.
Co-worker: "Have you seen the bosses new secretary? She's fucking hot."
Me: "Yeah. When bossman went to introduce us I got so hard I had to perform the one-hand tuck."
Me: "Yeah. When bossman went to introduce us I got so hard I had to perform the one-hand tuck."
by OstracizedElite May 23, 2015

by Kevin coates October 28, 2023
