A solo version of a blumpkin usually performed by jerkin it while taking a dump. It is usually performed by a Cringelord to the memory of some unrequited love. If the performer is short a couple ribs, either through surgical means or birth defect, may also be done full-simulation style.
Person A: Hey man, where did Cringelord go? he isn't bothering your friend again is he? I mean he's been after her so long when she's made it clear she just isn't that into him.
Person B: Nah, he just went to take a dump.
Person A: Oh, so he's doing a simulated blumpkin?
Person B: Yup...
Person B: Nah, he just went to take a dump.
Person A: Oh, so he's doing a simulated blumpkin?
Person B: Yup...
by evilleppy June 13, 2020
Get the simulated blumpkinmug. When a son is receiving head from either his mother, brother, sister, dad, grandma, grandpa, and cousins during the act of pooping.
by BigFatJuicy456 April 9, 2016
Get the Texas Blumpkinmug. While a man is shitting and receiving a bj another man runs in as you finish and shoves her head between his legs into the shitty water
by Mr the sandwich March 20, 2017
Get the blumpkin bombmug. by Bigdicktony69 April 27, 2021
Get the Boobie Blumpkinmug. A variation of a blumpkin (receiving oral sex while pooping) where the recipient is pooping into a 5 gallon bucket.
by KromPecker February 14, 2022
Get the Lund Blumpkinmug. While not ideal, Brian could not pass up the chance to receive a Rustic Blumpkin during an emergency deuce at the country festival porta potty by a townie.
by TheUrbanSombrero August 3, 2019
Get the Rustic Blumpkinmug. The seductive art of performing oral sex on a homeless person while they are simultaneously feasting on the contents of your dinner's to-go box.
by kdbamaman November 11, 2012
Get the Hobo Blumpkinmug.