walmart jesus

also called low-bar jesus

noun / the phenomenon of men being praised for the smallest accomplishments. men doing the bare minimum and being worshipped as great men (doing something that women do and DO NOT receive praise for because its seen as their innate responsibility).

"he always changes the baby, hes the best father."
"that's just walmart jesus. the bar is subterranean"

by georgia011 June 9, 2022

Eefin (Walmart edition)

Literally not the cutest person ever. Anyone who says otherwise is automatically saying no other human has ever existed. I know what you're thinking, and no I did not write this to prove a point. This is officially written by the legend-dairy John Decengre III of New Jersey.

To the person reading this (yes this actually has a purpose),

No need for any further explanation, you're officially ruled cuter by the public, judge, and jury. I rest my case. ;)

-Eefin (Walmart Edition)

by Eefin (Walmart Edition) March 22, 2021

Walmart Creature

Some one more sophisticated than a hobo, but less than white trash. They are usually poor, but never realize when they are close to being extremely rich. They might not be good at reading in general, or be educated past middle school. Charlie Kelly and Frank Reynolds, from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, for example, are Walmart Creatures

person1: Ew, look a Walmart Creature.
person2: I bet he could sell that and make millions, if it wasn't covered in drawings of penises.
person1: yeah. Why do we still go to this place?

by makeasequeltoDannyPhantom November 1, 2018

Walmart Weed

Really shitty weed which is often mostly shake.

C'mon bro are you really charging me $15 for a gram of Walmart Weed?

by mcmillerg January 27, 2019

Walmart boy

A boy that eats a girl out in the middle of Walmart

Boy: they call me Walmart boy

Girl: why ?
Boy: I ate a girl out in the middle of Walmart

Girl: ..... wanna go to Walmart?

by Tay1117 November 7, 2019

Walmart Whale

A cryptocurrency "whale" who can only afford to pump ~$100,000 USD at a time

DogeCoin Investor: "Woah dude have you seen the Whales pumping Request Network (REQ™)??"

DepressedCoin Investor: "What you mean the same 5 walmart whales pumping 100K at a time?"

by Smelly Toes™ August 20, 2021

walmart flu

The flu like cold that goes around Walmart every year, slowly getting worse until it disappears. In some people, it turns to pneumonia

"Shit, I caught the Walmart flu."

"Don't give it to me!"

by KLeonheart May 15, 2018