Gift cards

Money but you can only spend it on fuckass woollen carpets from ‘Home Solutions’. Don’t be a retard, put money in the fucking card.

Person 1: What did you get me for my birthday?
Person 2: Some gift cards for woollen carpets
Person 1: Boy, fuck you! You smelly shit licking bastard! Just give me normal fucking money!

by Mr. Horny Dinosaur September 28, 2025

green gifting

When buying for older people on your shopping list... Get them something you would like.... There's a "chance" you might get it back in a few years.... (when they die)

Helen, I'm green gifting mom those earrings we looked at in Tiffany's last week. I can't wait to wear them to her funeral.

by Rich Apple December 19, 2010

Gift of the Gab

The ability to lure children into one's dungeon.

Wtaf, George. You have the gift of the gab. I thought I told you that 5 kids in your basement was enough!

by Xvsgwksbdgud January 24, 2020

Shonky Gift Tactician

Yeay! 'Tis a fellow that impart nowt but the most worthless gifts upon another, whilst sporting a sincere smile of benevolence.

That Fuckwit is a Shonky Gift Tactician, he sucks balls.

by jimbobbedyjobob June 17, 2003

Visit the gift shop

To defecate, especially in a public or business restroom

"I think I'll visit the gift shop before I leave."

by Crown-Fondler October 25, 2022

Petaluma Gift Basket

Ms. Bihn really likes gift baskets…
see definition above

man, I heard you wanted to get Ms. Bihn something, how about a “Petaluma Gift Basket?”

by Mateo DeLucca May 26, 2022

Gift of Baba

When you're eating a girl out and she shits on your face. Occurs because Meher Baba is punishing you for having premarital sex, and is very common among his believers.

Noah:Dude, I just hooked up with this girl and she gave me the Gift of Baba!
Kacey: Oh no way!

by neonveon July 1, 2014