torque monkey

After the party, I took her home and let my torque monkey loose in her vagina.
by Jarhead8120 May 08, 2017
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Procrastination monkey

A lazy person who often procrastinates and delays their work, often eats bananas and other fruits shaped like a planetarium to stay big and strong.
Johnny: Mike is such a procrastination monkey, he has big dreams that he wants to achieve yet he's just laying there on his couch doing nothing to reach them.
David: I think he has schizophrenia! Give him the pills Johnny!
by CookieLikeABookie January 05, 2023
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Monkey Arm

A well-formed turd that is long enough to wrap around.
She got to the toilet just in time to pinch off a foot-long steaming monkey arm.
by Garbage Heap August 02, 2020
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puddle monkey

A tweaker who hangs out around other tweakers "usually broke" hoping for a chance to get a hit from the meth pipe
I cant believe that puddle monkey hasn't gone home yet
by penaTRAYshawn July 16, 2020
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crass monkey

A mixture of Four Loko and orange juice. A play on the traditional "brass monkey," consisting of a 40 of malt liquor and OJ.

Also known as "an even poorer man's mimosa."
Four Loko and orange juice? That is one tasty crass monkey!
by jgoodson28 January 24, 2011
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jump the monkey

When a woman returns home after a long and boring day working in a restaurant with the sole aim of getting shagged silly. Her advances lack subtlety as she just grabs at the man´s genitals demanding coitus. When faced with any resistance she jumps on the unaccommodating male and rides him into oblivion.
Nicky: Hey Amanda, do you fancy a drink after work?
Amanda: Nah, I don´t think so.
Nicky: Why not? Are you off home to jump the monkey?
Amanda: Yeah, I am fucking gagging for it.
Nicky: Crikey!!
by FurbyFuck10 October 08, 2015
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monkey-womb

monkey-womb

an offensive for a girl under being raised by a single father
Does Bill 101 even apply to a monkey-womb, or any child in Quebec raised by a single father, whose father is French-Canadian but the mother is not? Btw, one of the definitions of bastard is the male version monkey-womb.
by Sexydimma February 09, 2014
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