Traffic management is a job suitable for anyone and everyone that is a nonce, you literally spend your days pissing every possible road user off whilst sitting in a van noshing your colleague off and sitting on cones all the way to the base!
1 “hey did you see those guys noncing each other off in the van?”
2 “yeah don’t worry they’re traffic management”
2 “yeah don’t worry they’re traffic management”
by Banchoodgang March 30, 2020
Get the Traffic management mug.The person Karen wants to speak with
"Please mam I assure you that he didn't purposely forget the pickle" "yes I AM the manager"
"Please mam I assure you that he didn't purposely forget the pickle" "yes I AM the manager"
by Kill us May 6, 2020
Get the Manager mug.An old, time-honored management technique in large corporations.
1. Keep your employees in the dark.
2. Feed them shit.
3. When they grow up, cut them off at the roots.
1. Keep your employees in the dark.
2. Feed them shit.
3. When they grow up, cut them off at the roots.
by Hot Licks July 21, 2020
Get the The mushroom theory of management mug.The idea that one person can send five emails in one night and look like a superhero or on funny email chains they can end it with one very inapporpriate one. And he has small balls and tiny feet.
by Imasuperstar October 17, 2012
Get the Benchmark Managing mug.A (IT) management out of business reality, leaving from past and trying to prolong it as most as possible, hardly adopting a new model, not able to keep talented people. It can be used in a larger sense for defining at all the management quality in any organization, grasping the past not being able to innovate and adopt.
- Our business model has became a "dinosaurs", cloud is hitting hard, and our scatological management is not able to adopt to a new model.
by Chibas June 27, 2013
Get the Scatological Management mug.A peaceful gathering of senior staff focussing on self-congratulation and bonding, with blissful lack of awareness of duties neglected during the event, and of how pitifully inept, emotionally needy and ludicrous management looks to lower level staff. The more realistic title for such an event is used in confidence, as these events are promoted as a serious and necessary forums.
I'm so flat-out with all this work comen in I haven't got time to scratch meself. And I can't ask (insert manager name) to bring in a casual cos he's at this f**n management love-in.. Oh - look the Caterer - grab us a few sushi before the plates get taken in...
by MAKtheVague August 6, 2011
Get the Management love-in mug.A manager that defines ones self by using emails,constant tendering of the keyboard and delegation of of things they have meant to have done themselves.A job is finished when they either hit the enter key,or sent an email...and never actually give a second thought to those receiving the email the chaos they have just created,let alone know what their subordinates are really doing.Quite often they appear that their arse is welded to the chair,and are unable to get off said chair to go find out for themselves....even though they authourise the said item.
" I have sent them an email informing them of the problem"...but never bothers to chase up if the problem has been fixed.The job is deemed complete by hitting enter or " Send" hence the term " Enter Management"
by phluck September 4, 2011
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