Laser-Ham

Dear god, if you're looking this up it may already be too late for you. They are the dark ones, the decimators, the destroyers of civilization. The only actual sighting of them has reported them to look like abnormally large pieces of ham with glowing red eyes, who can shoot lasers strong enough to cut through anything. It's believed that the Bermuda Triangle is actually a den to these creatures, and the triangle is formed by three stationed hams firing lasers. They are commonly reported at redacted but seem to disappear by the time anybody arrives. One citizen who claims to have seen the Laser-Hams claimed that they were ruled by an "AbraHAM Lincoln", an Abraham Lincoln who much resembles our own, but instead has a piece of ham around his right eye, which is replaced with a glowing crimson one. It is not proven true or false if this entity exists yet.

Doomed person 1: "Dear god, the Laser-Ham, they're coming!"
Doomed person 2: "What's that? Are you insane?"
*Laser sounds and screaming of doom*

by The Drawer Goblin February 28, 2021

ham darts

It’s like regular darts but the dart board is a ham

Hey, are you up for a game of ham darts tonight?

by francis the mule May 22, 2022

Peeled hams

The act of pulling buttocks cheeks for various acts, such as defecating, anal penetration or voyeurism. Term coined in 2021 by Roger Verdon

He squated down, peeled hams and poo'd on the floor

by ROGIEV March 11, 2022

Ham Hogging

When your homeboy is doing more than just cartwheels on that shit

My boy Kyle was constantly Ham Hogging me during that uno game

by Mrfatcakes May 26, 2023

ham-fisting

the act of repairing things with little knowledge on the proper way of doing it. Similar to back yard mechanic but with the incentive to improve performance or resale value of the object being repaired

Did you see Nathan and Nick ham-fisting that ramp? I will probably break when they try to jump off of it.

by huck&shred March 7, 2013

ham sammich

A meal item containing ham, normally between two pieces of bread. You can also add mayo, mustard, lettuce, tomato, bacon, and cheese. Add some chips and a pickle for a full, satifying lunch.

Jase: What do we want?

Godwin: Lunch!

Jase: What do we want?

Godwin: HAM SAMMICH!

by John Godwin February 7, 2013

hangy ham

A girl who has very hangy vagina flaps that look like pieces of ham hanging down

"woah this girl calld sam had a reli hangy ham"

"i cud see her hangy ham thru her knickers, it was vile"

"her vagina hung down like a hangy ham"

by kdotpizzzzzlee July 22, 2009