3 definition by The Drawer Goblin

A very aggressive and bad phrase used to describe a not so good time or moment. It comes in many different sayings depending where you're at, other ways to put it are "like a tidal wave of cantaloupe", "an ocean of cantaloupe", "a stream of cantaloupe", and many more. Most commonly this phrase is used to describe an event and how you felt towards it, but it can also be managed to describe your overall mood in general.

The anti of this is "like a pool of melons", which is used to describe a good time or vibe. Both are commonly used in the same context, but feel free to get creative with your melon and cantaloupe water phrases!

The origins of this phrase are unknown, but it's rumored to have appeared in a small town when a man very upset at another ruined a stream by pouring a bunch of cantaloupes in it. This act of anger is what gave this phrase its negative nature and meaning. Most people prefer to stay on the melon side of things due to the more positive point of view, but it's okay to feel a bit of a cantaloupe stream every now and again too.

The commonly used phrase to describe yourself as actually said, a pool of melons. This is most often to display your coolness in a situation, and your absolute good vibe that you are currently feeling. Other uses can be "like melons flowing down a river", "like a melon ocean", and "that event was a melon tidal wave!". All of which keep the same meaning, to describe a good vibe and moment.

The anti of this is to say "like a pool of cantaloupes", a phrase used to describe an event with a bad vibe and that left you displeased.

Origins of these two phrases are currently unknown, but we believe that it was made in a small town by one man who decided to flow a bunch of melons down a stream with some upbeat music playing. The origin doesn't really matter though, just go out and have a pool of melons of a time!

Dear god, if you're looking this up it may already be too late for you. They are the dark ones, the decimators, the destroyers of civilization. The only actual sighting of them has reported them to look like abnormally large pieces of ham with glowing red eyes, who can shoot lasers strong enough to cut through anything. It's believed that the Bermuda Triangle is actually a den to these creatures, and the triangle is formed by three stationed hams firing lasers. They are commonly reported at redacted but seem to disappear by the time anybody arrives. One citizen who claims to have seen the Laser-Hams claimed that they were ruled by an "AbraHAM Lincoln", an Abraham Lincoln who much resembles our own, but instead has a piece of ham around his right eye, which is replaced with a glowing crimson one. It is not proven true or false if this entity exists yet.