douche beard

Noun. dōōsh beerd An over-trimmed beard, resembling a chin-strap and stopping at the chin or just above the neck.

Commonly sported by (but not limited to) beta-males in urban areas, the douche beard has spread into the realm of effete Jr. College wannabes and self-hating white hip-hop poseurs.

Douche beards are the mullets of this millennium and should be relegated to men of Asian and Latin descent who lack sufficient facial hair follicles to grow a full beard. Anyone else electively grooming their facial hair in this manner is immediately subject of ridicule and derision and of questionable taste/intellect.

Hey- if gonna have a beard then commit to a beard. Don't be a tool and sport douche beard; otherwise you'll look like K-fed, Timberlake or Turtle.

by firingprone September 22, 2009

douche cannon

a person who is far more douchebaggedy than your everday douche bag. That word is insufficient, which warrants the use of douche cannon, when this person is off the charts in douchebaggedness scale, and you would readily render them infertile using acid on their genitalia. Douche cannon originates from the early name calling methods used during the Revolutionary war era. British soldiers commonly degraded their fellow army members, when they were incompetent with a cannon or other gunpowder apparati, They were aptly named "douche cannons" and usually were subject to sodomy from their horse. In conclusion, this is the strongest level of douchebaggery, use it wisely for its conotations are far more powerfull than calling someone a fag, or retard, or shitbrick.

Speaker A- Dude my mom's a complete douche cannon

Speaker B- WTF i can't believe you just called your mom a douche cannon, thats serious shit

Speaker A- Yea.

by kermitbangme69 February 20, 2007

douche knight

A person who is a utter dick to everyone they meet. Name is primarly inspired by the movie the "dark kight", but with a little douche flavor.

Man, presswood sure is a douche knight!

by moon knight February 28, 2009

douche baggage

noun. The friends of friends that show up at parties and generally disregard the rules of the house making asses of themselves in the process. They are hard to get rid of for fear of offending your close friend that is friends with these people.

I'd invite Phil to the party but he always brings along his douche baggage.

by cynic4000 May 17, 2007

Douche Prick

Douche Prick is the best word to describe someone who is SO much worse than just a douche he is a mixture of both douchebag and prick. Use this word when you are angry but really need to hold back on the swear words. Perfect for public situations. If need be, you can shorten the word to just DP if children or unappreciative audiences are nearby.

1. That guy who wears pink popped collared shirts is such a douche prick!!

2. Your ex-boyfriend is such a douche prick!!

3. My boss is such a douche prick!!

by Douchepricked too many times September 11, 2009

Douche Bonnet

A derogatory term for someone with a tendency to spoil things, or create problems.

eg. "Everyone was keen to head to the after hours club, but Mark made us drive him home. What a douche bonnet."

by Berus November 14, 2011

Douche Tail

Long, excess part of one's belt, that hangs down in a douchy way, possibly bringing attention to one's genitalia. Only exhibited by an individuals with belts that are way too long.

Wearing a size 54 belt to hold up size 46 trousers, or short trousers, dangling that excess piece of leather...or other synthetic fiber belt. That braided douche tail really kicks it up one notch.

by zach galifinoccia February 14, 2012