UFO Alarm Clock

This knee charmer is often found in unique individuals with ties to super rich secret submarine service. Although known in military jargon as “foreign objects“, emergency surgery usually unearths armament shrapnel and pieces of snooze buttons from top quality alarm clocks. Still as mysterious as jimmy Hoffa’s disappearance, this enigma of a titillating experience is easily summarized as suspenseful supreme “pop” sensation and not for the feeble mortal, a UFO Alarm Clock is like kryptonite to Superman. If you ever run into someone who has experienced the rare UFO alarm clock, feel free to gift them only the best sour beers for a speedy recovery!

“Hey John, I heard about that UFO Alarm Clock”, you good bro?”

“Yeah man, nothing a good Sour Brew can’t fix”

by Torsiondrummer July 29, 2020

scuffed alarm

that kid named vincent on fortnite

person 1: who are you playing with??

person 2: scuffed alarm why?

by p0landspringfan August 22, 2020

six alarm chili

The act of placing a finger full of tiger balm or icy hot in and/or around someone's butthole.

Lois: Peter, I don't think "six alarm chili" is going to feel as good as you think. I mean, look at the name!

Peter: Lois, this is going to save our marriage. In fact, use two fingers and get in there deep!

*45 seconds later*

Peter: AH! AHHH! OH GOD!! IT'S LIKE A POPSICLE MADE OF RUBBING ALCOHOL!!!

by akaMrAndOrMsAlias October 1, 2020

false alarm

When you want to fck so you text your booty call to ask where shes at. But you end up wanking it by the time they respond. Thus losing the desire to bang.

Dude: Fck, Im so horny after this lunch. Wonder were Girl is.

{SextMessenger}
Dude> Hey whats up?
*1 hour later..
Girl> Not much, just bored! What about you?
Dude> Nm, False alarm.

by sdletsdance October 26, 2012

Alarm Cock

The act of waking up your girlfriend or wife for morning sex before her alarm clock goes off.

I woke up my wife with the "Alarm Cock" for a quicky before she got up to get ready for work.

by JBirch82 July 19, 2012

Oreo Alarm

The time in the middle of the night that you wake up after eating a large amount of Oreo's.

Johnny's Oreo alarm went off at 3:30 A.M. he purged that box of Oreo's that he ate earlier with the gallon of milk.

by Allgreen January 8, 2012

Multi-alarm method

The strategy of setting a ridiculous amount of alarms in the morning that may go off at five to ten minute intervals in attempt to get you up in the morning. Has potential to be successful, depending on the stubbornness of the cranky sleeper.

“Wow Jim! I’m shocked you made it on time today, how did you do it?”
“I just discovered the multi-alarm method! Looks like I’ll never be late to work again!”

by Cmdrx321 November 13, 2011