He has a massive penis and he loves making girls squirt and anyone who misses out on his massive cock you should feel sorry 4 them
lewi couch cock
by connor wallace February 19, 2018
The really ugly and/or fat girl that hangs out with the very attractive girls. The attractive girls will still say that the unattractive girl is "cute". The couch muffin will go EVERYWHERE with the attractive ones.
"Dude, the chick Charlotte tried to hook me up with is a total couch muffin!"
"Man that sucks! Why does Charlotte have such an unattractive friend, when all the others are amazingly attractive?"
"Man that sucks! Why does Charlotte have such an unattractive friend, when all the others are amazingly attractive?"
by TheCleanSanchez July 17, 2012
by CusIcan December 13, 2013
When the couch commands you to stay in a soft gentle smoothing voice. The inability to leave the safety of the couch because the world beyond is just not safe.
My girlfriend has become couch locked after eating an entire willie wonky edible and is now crying and laughing at the same time in a fetal position refusing to leave the safety of the couch after 3 hours.
by drew a button December 13, 2020
(kow-che mag-net) n. Normally a male humanoid whose ass attracts nearby couches. Both the couch and ass will form a near unbreakable bond only separated by getting beers from the fridge, using the restroom, or women. The attraction from ass to couch may vary depending on nearby televisions or video game systems.
guy1: "where are you going?"
guy2: "dude, dont look now but there is a fine leather couch in front of a huge flat screen at 10 o'clock"
guy1 & guy2: "wwaaaaaooohhhhhh"
guy1: "this is a real comfy couch"
guy2: "I know right? its good to be a couch magnet"
guy2: "dude, dont look now but there is a fine leather couch in front of a huge flat screen at 10 o'clock"
guy1 & guy2: "wwaaaaaooohhhhhh"
guy1: "this is a real comfy couch"
guy2: "I know right? its good to be a couch magnet"
by glassfungus February 05, 2010
I was knee deep in that couch taco
by burritoslocos April 22, 2015
by Yuki putt November 22, 2015