mormon

slang for people who are part of the Mormon church. Their church is actually called The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Common misconceptions include:

-they cannot eat chocolate (false. wtf?)

-Mormons are not Christian
(VERY false)

-Mormons are polygamists/support polygamy (FALSE AF)

- they are required to have 12 children (lmao false)

-birth control is prohibited (false)
-they hate gay people (F A L S E)
-they believe gay people automatically go to hell (FALSE)

-Mormons worship Joseph Smith (FALSE)
-all Mormons live in Utah (false)
-Mormons hate the Bible (f.a.l.s.e. High schoolers literally take a year long class on it. Mormons believe the Bible.)
-Mormons cannot have caffeine (false. Mormons are against addictive substances, so some stay away from caffeine as a personal rule. Lots of Mormons love their Dr Pepper)

It's true Mormons don't believe in The Trinity--they believe God, Jesus Christ, and Holy Ghost are three separate beings.

Also true: Mormons don't drink alcohol (aka kno how to have the time of their life without a substance) or coffee or tea, get tattoos, or zillions of piercings (basically, super into respect for their bodies)

Stereotypical Mormons are hot rich superfriendly blondes. Tragically, very small % of Mormons fulfill this stereotype (but not none ;)))

Mormons try their best to be good people

NOTE: the musical the Book of Mormon is 1 hilarious 2 shockingly disrespectful 3 not an accurate portrayal of Mormon faith/people

nonmormon: "MORMONS ARENT CHRISTIAN!!1!!!!1!"
Mormon 1: *exhausted sigh*
Mormon 2: "lmao. The words 'Jesus Christ' are in the title of our Church. Jesus Christ is the basis of everything we believe."

"You don't drink? What are you, Mormon?"
*friendly smile/shrug* "yeah I am lol"

by Mustangandromedus May 10, 2017

mormon

A strong, offensive term for a boy scout who attempts to get the Eagle Scout rank at or before age fifteen. In other words, the pre-med of scouting.
While a good mormon (usually an actual LDS member) will achieve his goal through hard work and determination, most mormons get to Eagle early by hacking through the scouting system.
A typical mormon gets to Eagle Scout in the sleaziest way possible, superficially demonstrating knowledge while not actually retaining it and completing his requirements and Eagle Project the easy way. They leave scouts without any of the skills and virtues that their peers have.
The term "mormon" comes from the fact that almost every mormon (religion) is a mormon (scout jargon). The Church of Later Day Saints and the Boy Scouts of America have a synergetic partnership of sorts, where a mormon boy's religious advancement can closely mirror his scout advancement. Unfortunately, this creates a high standard for Eagle Scout ages, so other scouts (some of them LDS members) try to match them.

Your once-in-a-lifetime Eagle Project is painting a sign? You mormon.

"Wanna go tip Austin's canoe with me?"
"No, I need to go get stuff signed off."
"Mormon."

by Aybraus April 19, 2008

mormon missionary

sweet, cute, respectable young gentlemen...who love their religion and devote their lives for 2 years riding around like little goofs wearing suits on bicycles and going to peoples houses everday spreading the mormon religion and 9/10 times getting rejected......but good luck tryna date one, they only wanna date mormon girls, and they only date girls they might wanna marry in the future...they dont really hook up... LITTLE CUTIES.

doorbell rings
a mom: its those mormons trying to preach their religion to us for the 10th time.... dont get it!!!
a daughter: looks through door peepholedaaaayuuumn that blonde mormon missionary is finnne!!!!!!!!!!!! come on in!!!!!!

by kristyn sutherland March 13, 2006

mormon whore

Also known as a "Kohler". A mormon whore is a mormon girl or boy who hooks up with a lot of different people and makes others believe they are not actually mormon until they have the opportunity to have sex, or engage in sexual activity, in which they have to decline.

"Thay boy is such a mormon whore! We made out and he was gettin' into it, but then I wanted to go further and he said "no"."

by Dwizzle2 May 11, 2009

mormon

The majority of a well-dressed colony of people that have chosen to live underground because no one likes them and/or likes to read their boring pamphlets. Go Away Already! Stay beneath the manholes you belong under.

Mormon: Hey little boy, want to lear about Hell?
Little Boy: Umm....
Little Boy's Dad: Stay away from my son you river rat!!!

by Bagelbites007 September 29, 2008

monona

A small, rich, very beautiful, but generally close-minded suburbian community in Wisconsin, not unlike the suburb that Edward stays in in the film Edward Scissorhands. A stereotypical vision of an average American community. Monona is a suburb of Madison, but the similarities are few.

Everything is so close that you can walk anywhere, but Monona kids are so spoiled that their parents drive them everywhere. If Monona was large enough to have public transportation, they wouldn't ride in it because it would be too dirty and scary for them.

The majority of Monona's youth are extremely sheltered, spoiled, and ridiculously ungrateful. The groups of kids that call themselves "gangs" in Monona hang out after school at the public library, because that's just how hardcore they are in Monona.

Anyone with strange clothes in the community will be called a "poser", "bitch", etc. by the residents, and is subject to nonstop taunting and harassment.

The majority of the girls are slutty, stereotypical back-stabbing preppies, and the majority of the boys are slutty, perverse, stereotypical jock/preppies.

Most of the "subcultural" kids shop at Hottopic and listen to mainstream radio, out of unintentional ignorance.

Ponds and lakes around Monona have killed dogs with their filth. It is the part of this suburb that really represents what sort of people live there.

My name is StereotypicalPreppie, and I'm from Monona. OMG, I am soooo pissed off at my parents, they gave my third iPod to my little brother!! I can't believe it. I think I'm going to go pretend to smoke some weed because I'm so EXTREMELY rebellious. Maybe afterwards I'll go hang out with the Night Riders at the public library. We'll probably get kicked out because we're sooo gangster.

by Rebekah Rebel August 2, 2006

Mormon

A person of a religious cult that comes onto urban dictionary to attempt to make right the "wrongs" of what the rest of the users are saying about this religion. They try to say that all understandings about the Mormon faith are common misconceptions, then continue to promote Mormonism. Unfortunately, most of these "misconceptions" are actually plain truth; showing just how incompetent they truly are.

Guy one: Dude, this user on Urban totally just said that Mormonism is the right faith! Maybe it actually is...

Guy two: yeah, they're actually a Mormon too... They're lying, it isn't the right faith

by Lazinator July 12, 2009