blake turner

Biggest douche and consumer of date tape

Look that douche at the checkout line and all His date tape. Must be Blake Turner.

by more dudes September 22, 2013

Ben Turner

When you claim to be so drunk you don't forget embarrassing and borderline illegal events from the night before despite hardly drinking atall and clearly being sober. For example, trying to rape a girl only to be punched in the face and left bleeding.

Lots of love, carlos and clark xo

" Ey?! I did not try to force this girl into sex?! I don't remember that? I don't remember her battering me?! I was wrecked !! I had 4 cans FFS ! "

" Mate, I rate he's trying to pull a Ben Turner here "

by CarlosClarkSickCDpartnership May 1, 2010

Timmy Turner

The coolest kid on the planet. Often seen hanging around with different discolored animals. Also mysteriously stays in the 5th grade since 2001 along with his friends.

Andy: Dude that kid is totally Timmy Turner!
Steven: Check out those awesome pink and green goldfish!
Andy: Timmy Turner is definitely the coolest kid on the planet.

by Double T in the Morning January 2, 2010

Finger Turner

An eBook that is exciting to read and hard to put down.

I need ice for my finger. I was e-reading a Stephen King book last night --- it was so good,I couldn't put it down. It's a real Finger Turner

by jbbruce001 April 18, 2011

Turner Bartels k-8

Welcome to Turretner Bitchtels! Home of the FAKE, and if not the fake, home of lying, cringy, ugly, drug selling and, useless sluts. Nothing says Turner Bartels like stolen phones, unathletic black kids, racist teachers, annoying grade sluts that think everyone loves them, weird ass Indians, and kids that won’t hit puberty until there mid 30’s. A good thing is if your lucky you might find a slut that actually has cleavage instead if every flat girl in the school, but watch out! 90 percent of them have aids so... In conclusion if your looking for a shitty school with constant bullying by teachers and used old pussy, Turner Bartels is the place to go!

I hate Turner Bartels k-8

by Bo111 February 16, 2018

Captain Turner

The act of dislodging one's eyeball from its socket with only a finger.

Ex: My baby with his crazy ass hands tries to Captain Turner me all the time.

If you don't quit looking at me, I'm going to Captain Turner your ass.

This movie is so horrible, I'm about to Captain Turner myself.

That girl is so ugly, it makes me want to Captain Turner my ass.

In the third season of Deadwood, Danny (Al Swearingen's bodyguard) and Captain Turner (George Hearst's bodyguard) have a showdown in the thoroughfare which results in Captain Turner getting his eyeball removed by Danny's index finger. It's pretty fucking nasty.

by BSwannie April 8, 2012

Taint Turner

A "Taint Turner" is the official term for a double rim job in which two people lick each other's butt holes AT THE SAME TIME. It's kind of like "69" except one person must arch their back in order for the deed to be achieved. It is not for the faint of heart or Mormons.

Remember that one time when we did the "Taint Turner" after eating Indian food.

by Rimmy Jimmy March 13, 2014