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masterbatory scheming

The act of plotting secret masturbation acts from those around you or living with you.

"Little Billy is the master of masterbatory scheming, his parents thinks he likes being clean and showers five times a day"
"Little Billy is the master of masterbatory scheming, his parents thinks he likes being clean and showers five times a day"
by Hylindar September 2, 2014
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masterbation realization

Just after you nut where you go
"Wow this girl I just jacked off to is real nasty." Or where you loose complete sexual interest after you bust.
You- Fuck me this chick is sucking that dick so good.

You post nut- Man wtf this chick is nasty and the concept of porn is fucked up, I mean I'm getting off to someone getting off wtf man I just had a
"Masterbation Realization".
by Brewski Jones June 5, 2017
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Mental Masterbation

Pondering philosophical questions, which may be enjoyable, yet are so removed from reality, or experience that they have no practical use.

Someone that thinks of far out 'what if' questions

Note- Not all philosophy is mental masterbation.
"Today we spent three hours mentally masterbating to Kant's critique of pure reason"

"I got a degree in mental masterbation!" someone graduating with a degree in rhetoric, philosophy, anthropolgy, multicultural studies, etc
by Marcus L January 1, 2008
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Masterbation Station

An area - usually your room - where you go to watch porn or just to beat your meat over someone
Rob spends all his time in his masterbation station watchin' animal porn
by Sir Marc Wilcox February 16, 2009
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Masterbathe

"Dude i was in a dry spell for a while and had blue-balls, so i took a shower and masterbathed"
by memofukka June 5, 2010
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Masterdating

When a person (typically a guy) goes out to see a movie, or visits a theme park, or place otherwise mostly occupied by couples or friends,but does this alone. This can cause sympathy from other people that watch them as they purchase tickets or enter the area. This is different from when a person grabs a cup of coffee, or sits in a coffee shop alone for a few minutes, or rents a movie, or eats fast food. Masterdating involves often going to a restaurant alone, and sitting at the table alone, while some people look and either feel bad, or think that the person is a looser, or going to see a movie alone. It is often done by older men that may be widowed, or by people that can't get a girlfriend, or are the "40 year old virgin" type
You: 4 tickets for (name of movie) please
Masterdater behind you: 1 ticket for (name of movie) please

You (thinking) awe, he's alone, i guess he's Masterdating.
by titagula December 12, 2010
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masterbate

The complete incorrect spelling of masturbate Since it's a misspelling it means "Being a master of bate" Or perhaps "Master of bait".
Yo yo! This is so phat!!!111!eleven!1 Ahm all foo illiterate and I went all MASTERBAAATE today!!111!11! You go wafsha!!!11!one!
by Surazal February 1, 2004
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