Jaron Artolius Eckbert III

Jaron Artolius Eckbert III is from The Ascendance Series (The best novel series by Jennifer A. Nielson)

Jaron is the King of Carthya. He's stupid and reckless and apparently really hot.

He somehow has a wife.
Good for him.
Jaron is somehow not dead. Rumor has it he burned the castle throne room down at age negative two. He has a crippled right leg thanks to Roden.

I actually don't know how he's not dead.

A: Did ypu hear what stupid thing Jaron Artolius Eckbert III did today?
B: Oh yeah, I heard he fell of of a 987654ft tree today.
A: No, that was last tuesday, today, he started a fire with water.

by anoverusedjoke June 28, 2021

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Jaron and Sophia

It- It just makes sense period.

Jaron and Sophia had fun yesterday 😩

by sneezys April 04, 2021

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Jaron

This man has the biggest, fattest, slimiest, hugest, veiniest, most massive jaron-son any beautiful black man could ever have. All the bitches wanna be his hoe but he's a one-gal guy. He's so confident that he only wears a ski mask in public, the police are too dazzled by his shiny cock glimmering in the sun to arrest him. When he wears sweatpants, he has to run from the crowd slobbering at the sight of his perfect bulge. You know when he's around because you can hear the slapping of the meat anytime he's around the corner, not even hard or flaccid.

Girl 1: Is that an earthquake? Girl 2: No, Jaron's just out for a run.

Guy 1: It's the middle of the night, why is it so bright outside? Guy 2: The streetlights must be reflecting off of the Jaron -son.

I wish I could be like 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of Jaron.

by Jaron lover February 22, 2024

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