Christopher Columbus

To lay claim of ownership to something/someone that isn't yours, more commonly associated with relationships.

Girl, I told him that I had a boyfriend now, but he tried to Christopher Columbus me and claim the p**sy is still his.

by DiamondDCee August 2, 2011

Christopher Columbus

Contrary to what the shoddy school curriculum tells you, Christopher Columbus was actually a genocidal piece of shit. Yes it's true that he discovered America, but he brutally attacked native inhabitants of the west indies if they went against his wishes during the slavery era. Some examples of the bad things he did is cannibalising, feed babies to dogs and alligators and of course cheating Native Americans and Africans out of their own land (Colonialism). In short, he was another barbarous and pernicious murderer complicit in a great amount of sanguinary who got his colonists to buy slaves to do basically everything for him and his own territory. Basically in the same way Hitler manipulated the Nazis into murder 6 million Jews.

School: Christopher Columbus was a patriotic explorer who discovered America.

5th Graders: WOW! WHAT AN AMAZING GUY!

Reality: A bloodthirsty cold-hearted killer. Little do the Native American and African children in elementary school know that Christopher Columbus colonised lands and enslaved people of their ethnicity.

by UltimateDoge June 14, 2021

Christopher Columbus

People still celebrate him for some reason. He is some old white dude who took advantage of the Native Americans and did very concerning things to them. He doesn't deserve a holiday and he is all around a dick.

You: Did you here its Christopher Columbus day?
Me: Oh that asshole? Who "discovered America" even though he didn't?

by Deforestation sucks May 18, 2021

Christopher Columbus

a BITCH. didn't "discover" shit. there's a fucking HOLIDAY for this colonizing mf. he stole land from a minority group and spread diseases, some of which came from animals... think that one through for a second. schools will teach you about this mf and praise his crackerjack ass when in reality he did nothing great.

Jae: Who the hell is Christopher Columbus?
Brian: A crackerjack, colonizing, mayo monkey p.o.s who enslaved natives and sold their kids into a sex ring.

by silenceytvoices May 26, 2021

Christopher Columbusing

When you use your hands to touch another person sexually after they are sleeping. Or when you use your hands to touch someone sexually for the first time.

Last night I told my wife that I was going to go Christopher Columbusing on her while she slept.

by NickM808 September 18, 2017

Christopher Columbus

When you go to the bathroom in another department at work to leave the vilest shit possible.

I had to go over to General Assembly to get some parts and Christopher Columbus'd while I was there.

by Kemo_the_Clown June 3, 2022

Christopher Columbus

When you take a shit and leave it for the next person to discover it

I had to poop so bad in the Waffle House. When I walked in there was a Christopher Columbus starring at me!

by Dark star August 20, 2023