An epic gamer, and artist in many fields. A bit lonely but it’s okay his fans relate. A little mean cutie patootie
by Dirpppsy February 17, 2024
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by Daddywjhehdhd June 20, 2022
Get the John mug.john is an adorable boy with an unusually dry and sarcastic sense of humor. although he is super funny, he usually uses humor as a coping mechanism. he's pretty shy at first and takes awhile to open up, but once he does he becomes more comfortable around you and will definitely confide in you. he has a great taste in music and likes alternative, unpopular bands. he is very small and thin, and he also has the cutest brown eyes. he is really adorable but has no idea. he is pretty insecure so he stands with bad posture. he can seem jaded and negative a lot of the time, but he is the best friend you could ever ask for. it's hard not to have a crush on him :)
by slytherdor October 7, 2020
Get the john mug.by Con_kae May 22, 2024
Get the Little John mug.John Pork was born into poverty, never knowing his mother. His father, a pig, died when John was only three, leaving him an orphan. As the offspring of a human and a pig, John was best described as a man-pig—akin to South Park's "man-bear-pig." After his father's death, John was sent to the Adoptuah "Adopt on that thang" Adoption Center, where he was adopted by G-Man, a key figure in the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion. G-Man was a celebrated pilot in the Toilet Force Air and flew the notorious "We Bring the Boom."
John's adopted mother, Hailey Welch, was an international star and the host of the popular podcast Talk Tuah. At 20, John was invited onto her show, sparking his rise to fame. His appearance led to a national phenomenon: John Pork calling people. After the podcast, John began dialing strangers' phones, causing panic and outrage. The unsolicited calls sparked protests, and the song "John Pork Is Calling", by artist dontcarewontcare, became a global hit.
However, John Pork's fame was fleeting. When the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion reignited, John was drafted. Eager to follow his father's legacy, he joined the Toilet Force Air, piloting the same plane his father had. His bravery earned him the codename "Hawk 2" and the Flickermunting Award for Upstanding Gooning.
Afterward, John met Joana Pork, his future wife, and settled in Georgia. He worked for a government contractor, built the Pork Family Compound, and fathered three children: Jimmy Ham, John Pork Jr., and Billy Bacon.
John's adopted mother, Hailey Welch, was an international star and the host of the popular podcast Talk Tuah. At 20, John was invited onto her show, sparking his rise to fame. His appearance led to a national phenomenon: John Pork calling people. After the podcast, John began dialing strangers' phones, causing panic and outrage. The unsolicited calls sparked protests, and the song "John Pork Is Calling", by artist dontcarewontcare, became a global hit.
However, John Pork's fame was fleeting. When the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion reignited, John was drafted. Eager to follow his father's legacy, he joined the Toilet Force Air, piloting the same plane his father had. His bravery earned him the codename "Hawk 2" and the Flickermunting Award for Upstanding Gooning.
Afterward, John met Joana Pork, his future wife, and settled in Georgia. He worked for a government contractor, built the Pork Family Compound, and fathered three children: Jimmy Ham, John Pork Jr., and Billy Bacon.
"Hey Adrian, you're getting a call!"
"Oh, it's from my good friend, John Pork!"
"Dude. Have you heard dontcarewontcares new single 'John Pork is calling...?' EVERYONE is listening to it!"
"Yeah, man! I saw Skibidi Chris listening to it earlier!"
"Haley Griner, what do you think of John Pork?"
"He's SO HOT!!"
"Oh, it's from my good friend, John Pork!"
"Dude. Have you heard dontcarewontcares new single 'John Pork is calling...?' EVERYONE is listening to it!"
"Yeah, man! I saw Skibidi Chris listening to it earlier!"
"Haley Griner, what do you think of John Pork?"
"He's SO HOT!!"
by Pork's Historical Society November 25, 2024
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