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defensive

The most sure way to make absolutely everyone hate you. It's the absolute most DESPICABLE fucking thing a human being can ever do. Bar fucking none.

I will say this once, and I will not say it again:

NEVER.
GET.
DEFENSIVE.

It'll be the absolute last fucking thing you'll ever do. Mark my fucking words.
A: *gets defensive*
A: *gets hated by everyone*
A: *Surprised Pikachu face*
by Someone32143214 August 24, 2022
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the Hunter Defense

As zainy of a legal defense as Bird Law, the Hunter Defense is when you know the outcome, but refuse to acknowledge it, because it did not go in your own favor.
Garrett used the Hunter Defense when questioned about losing a foot race to a slow white guy, so he could avoid lifelong embarrassment.
by Matthew2131 February 23, 2024
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The 'I have kids' defense

The ultimate trump card. When you're down and out it's the last defense you have against people trying to justify your repositioning in society.
Hym "A prime example of the 'I have kids' defense is KRISTI NOEM. In her interview after it was revealed that she shot her own dog, she DESPERATELY tried to employ this defense before being shoved out of the spotlight. 'I'm a mother! I wanna go upies! Not downies! Nooooooooooo!' Heheheheh... And a more recent example is Andrew Tate's interview after getting out recently. 'I have kids! I'm supposed to be able to do whatever I want! Anything and everything is justifiable when you have kids!' Ha! It's ALWAYS THE CASE! He stole? He had to steal for the kids! Why does policy need to change? The kids? Why did we bomb those kids? The kids of course. But your kids are just you. Nothing changed when you had them. Maybe, socially, you moved into the class of people that other people have to give a shit about by way of extension. That's not real a change though. Your kids = You. Their inflated value exists only in relationship to you. Saying 'MY kids are more important than anything' is no different that saying 'I'm more important than anything.' You. Same thing."
by Hym Iam August 24, 2024
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Hall Of Fame Defense

by keke032 January 6, 2024
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German Secretary of Defense

Currently it is Annegret Kramp-Karrenbauer who you cannot take serious because she is a career horny wannabe chancellor.
In order to increase the probability to be nominated for the chancellor job she just ran for the office of the Secretary of Defense.
She does not have any military experience neither.
She is also known as “Mini Merkel” because people compare her limply incompetent politics with Merkel.
Now the Bundeswehr (German Military) is fucked up again.
1: Do you know the German Secretary of Defense?

2: Before it was Ursula von der Leyen. But van der Leyen is now Commission President of the EU.
Now the Secretary of Defense of Germany is Annegret Kramp-Karrenbauer.
What a difficult name, huh?
And again a limply person for an office next to Merkel.
by aPublisherFromEurope July 25, 2019
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Self Defense

When a white person attacks you unprovoked
"The other day Jonathan caught me with his girl and he tried to self defense me!"
by SmeeveJeeve April 22, 2025
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defensive

The gaslighter's bread and butter. The word you will most likely hear from them if you do anything other than acknowledge and accept their bullshit in some lame attempt to guilt trip you into doing it.
Gaslighter: *throws bullshit at victim*
Victim: *angrily reprimands gaslighter for it*
Gaslighter: "See, you're being defensive, stop it"
by Someone32143214 July 7, 2022
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