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Von-St. Aubinomics

Developed by the great M. Von St. Aubin, Von-St. Aubinomics (Now knows as the VSA5) are a set of 5 Postulates that can explain any news story. They can also provide a foundation for understanding events in your personal life, well… his personal life anyway. The first three deal directly with understanding news, the final two speak to personal life, and they only apply to M. Von St. Aubin himself. 
When asked why he included Postulate 4 and 5 if they only apply to him, M. Von St. Aubin replied simply: “cuz I want the gub-ment to know that I know.”
 
The VSA5 in their entirety:
Postulate 1: The Government is not to be trusted, thus ALL government data are lies.
Postulate 2: The laws of Supply and Demand are hogwash; they are two completely unrelated phenomenon.
Postulate 3: All big business (e.g. Banks, Oil, especially Google) are coconspirators of the government and by extension of Postulate 1, cannot be trusted, and all big business data are also lies.
Postulate 4: My personal information is MINE, and you can’t have it. This holds true even if providing my personal information will have some benefit me financially or to my health.
Postulate 5: Entitlement is the most important right. I should get everything for free.
Dude 1: WTF was that guy talking about?
Dude 2: some crazy shit called Von-St. Aubinomics!
by Von St. Aubin March 5, 2011
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Von Dumpski

A polite way of saying you have to take a shit
Hey I'll be right there! I gotta take a me a von dumpski real quick!
by The Double E August 26, 2023
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Ilsa Schicklgrubermeiger-von Helsinger Kepelugerhoffer

Ilsa Schicklgrubermeiger-von Helsinger Kepelugerhoffer (known premaritally as Ilsa Schicklgrubermeiger) is the main antagonist of The Suite Life of Zack & Cody, often appearing in several episodes. She was a hotel inspector from Germany in her first appearance.
"I- I just"
"Ja?"
"Your name-"
"Ja?"
"I can't- I just- ok, what's your name?"
"Oh, ja! for some reason people have trouble. I am Ilsa Schicklgrubermeiger-von Helsinger Kepelugerhoffer ."
"I-"
by whatyoustaringat. May 7, 2021
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De Von

De Von is an amazing, awesome, fantastic guy. He is one of the greatest guys you will ever find. He is timid at first, but he is talkative, funny, and kind once you get to know him. De Von is loyal, sweet, always knows what to say, he can make you smile no matter what, he is the most amazing person, but he will deny it if you say it. He says he has an anger problem, but he certainly doesn't show it.
I'm so lucky, I met a De Von !!
by De Von November 22, 2021
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Talon Von Bagan

Harbinger of Hatred, Bringer of Chaos, End of Time, God of Extinction this last one is his favorite he is most Cruel unmerciful Satanic Titan you’ve wish you’d never met he leads an army known as the fists of Ragnarok formed from killers and mercenaries
Talon Von Bagan: From now on you work for me
by Gojira Octavio April 24, 2022
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king von

yo did you hear that new king von ?
fuck you dickriding ass nigga he dead as hell
by free young thug, free ysl January 24, 2023
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