Taint Henneley

When you pass out after a long night of drinking and your friends shave their pubes and glue them to your face. AKA "Sasquatch Dingleberry."

Last night my buddy got wasted and we gave him a "Taint Henneley."

by Ryan Tapley October 27, 2008

Taint Splitter

When you drop a turd that’s so hard, so long and so girthy you feel like your taint is being slowly split in half as the behemoth passes.

From the moans coming from the stall next to mine, I’m pretty that guy was forcing out a taint splitter.

Hey braaaaaahhh I’m really hurting. I just has a taint splitter. Will you do a brooohhh a solid and take a gander at my taint and make sure it’s not bleeding?

I’m going to have to take a laxative. I can’t take anymore taint splitters.

by Eaton Holgoode October 16, 2018

taint dial

when shitting in a public restroom, one may be afraid to rest your phone on a strange surface. the only other option is to rest it in your underwear as a safety net. depending on how the long the wipe takes, one may forget to remove the phone. once the pants are pulled up and snug, you may dial the phone with your taint

Damien: "i was on the toilet so long the other night, i forgot i rested a mean game of angry birds on my drawers. wouldn't you know when all was said and done, i taint dialed my mom. plus, the phone smelled like burnt tacos for a week."

butt dial
pocket dial

by luvitwenucallmebigpasta July 17, 2012

suck taint

A term used in order to tell someone to fuck off or to say suck my dick, usually in a situation where the person you say it to is making no sense or they're an idiot

OP:" Where are we?"
Victim: " Goodhue County one Goodhue County nine"
OP: "Suck taint! That's not helpful"

by QuebxcOnVocab July 23, 2020

Tainted Meat

When a girl (eg. Caitlin) is ragged about by a famous rapper (eg. Big T) she is then tainted and no men would want to enter her cave of doom.

Nah mate her batty stinks she’s also tainted meat due to getting a big Blackpool slong inside her.

by PadddeeTheNonce February 29, 2020

taint stew

When your dick and balls are sweating hard as fuck so your taint is sweating as well, thus begins a mix to create a stew like brew that smells of old sweaty gym socks, sweaty earring backs, and sweaty testicles.

"Bruh I got the meanest taint stew brewing right now, my balls are sweaty as hell."

by 12Soft June 15, 2014

taint wad

The rolled up kleenex that a man will stuff between your butt checks to soak up the sweat during the heat of the summer.

It was a hot humid steaming day and John was concerned that his taint wad was slipping from his crack!!

by SugarCube May 23, 2013