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computer engineering

A profession that is hard to learn, hard to practise.
Computer engineering students usually wear plaid shirts and rimless eyeglasses.
by gcx February 22, 2011
mugGet the computer engineeringmug.

computer killer

When u fun all over your laptop or computer due to hardcore masturbating
"I'm a computer killer"
"Whys that John?"
"Because I cummed all over my computer and it short circuited"
by Yolo butter balls April 21, 2016
mugGet the computer killermug.

Apple computer

Originally designed as an educational tool in the 70's it was marketed as the first computer small and cheap enough to be owned by individual consumers. Touted as the first "personal computer" and simple enough that a child could learn to operate they gained contracts with U.S. schools. They had 2 main competitors IBM which focused on business applications and Commodore who focused on entertainment (games and media).

As each improved it's side applications Commodore had trouble in the market as businesses leaned heavier on IBM and Apple had contracts with the U.S. educational systems. People saw games and media as frivolous and Commodore filed bankruptcy. However Apple snatched up bits of it and started to develop visual media which is still it's bragging point today.
IBM set it's sights on international markets and set a standard for clones and compatible systems working with Microsoft they developed the windows operating system and truly became personal computers globally.

Apple, although making models for individuals, has somehow gone to market as simply "Apple" all others systems are called PC (personal computers).

A closer look shows this to be true. IBM compatible computers have programs written by anyone and used by individual preference.

Apple is developed by Apple, licensed by Apple and largely slow or incompatible with any other systems They cost 2-3 times more and have a cult like following of hipsters and people who think they know more than everyone else.
I got the most expensive computer on the market!

Oh, really? What kind of Apple computer did you get?
by Appledumpster June 25, 2017
mugGet the Apple computermug.

computer pants

A better sounding name for the underwear you wear in front of a computer for maximum comfortability (and thermal balance) when you are alone at home and don't have to go somewhere.
When I get home, I'll change into my computer pants.
by felixh September 30, 2016
mugGet the computer pantsmug.

computer stooge

Jim used to have a computer, but it crashed one day and now he thinks it's broken for good. He has been offline for 3 years now. What a Computer Stooge!
by rolisk August 4, 2007
mugGet the computer stoogemug.

Crowd Computing

A sub-section of Cloud Computing offered by service providers that under-invest in both server infrastructure and technical support staff.

Companies that outsource to them do not realise that they are being crammed in like sardines to the vendors infrastructure which is nowhere near adequate. They only start to realise they are up shit creek when they try to contact technical support for help only to be placed in the longest most painful telephone queue of their life.
Afghan: "None of our 1,000 employees can access their online email application, my CIO's already been fired and I'm next for the chop...I opened a support ticket with the vendor 5 days ago and this is the 26th time I've tried to get through to them on the phone...I am dead meat man, dead meat <sniff>."

Tragic: "Well Afghan, that's Crowd Computing for you."
by Tragic Stan November 20, 2010
mugGet the Crowd Computingmug.

computer witness

A particular subgenre of computer geek. Someone who is obsessed with computers for the sake of computers and not for what they can do. Will often spend hours running performance tests and having "races" between different chips with various programs without ever getting any actual work done on said equipment.
Gene longs for the good old days of the Macs-vs-PCs war...those were some good times, up late with a flat of Mountain Dew and all his buddies racing their computers. Gene is a computer witness.
by DJ HORSERACING ACCIDENTS September 1, 2004
mugGet the computer witnessmug.

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