Jesus is everything in my life
by tysan ibraTyson ibrahim cha January 1, 2018
1. Unequivocally bitchin'. Used where awesome, cool, sweet, dope, bangin' and monkey slappin' fail--a term so Jesus it fails to describe itself.
i.e. "That party was so Jesus!" "This guacamole is Jesuser than a motherfucker!" And the ever popular, "It ain't bitchin' if it ain't Jesus!"
2. Truth beyond truth. (Note that this usage of the term carries mystical powers, as it may be used to catalyze the transformation of previous nontruths into truths truer than other truths. It is not uncommon for a Jesus person to Jes-ify something previously nonJesus simply by using the word Jesus to describe it.)
Usage of the term 'Jesus' is highly useful to a Jesus peep. It is through this usage that a Jesus peep is able to simultaneously assert and assess the jesus-ness of him or herself and other, potentially Jesus people.
i.e. "That party was so Jesus!" "This guacamole is Jesuser than a motherfucker!" And the ever popular, "It ain't bitchin' if it ain't Jesus!"
2. Truth beyond truth. (Note that this usage of the term carries mystical powers, as it may be used to catalyze the transformation of previous nontruths into truths truer than other truths. It is not uncommon for a Jesus person to Jes-ify something previously nonJesus simply by using the word Jesus to describe it.)
Usage of the term 'Jesus' is highly useful to a Jesus peep. It is through this usage that a Jesus peep is able to simultaneously assert and assess the jesus-ness of him or herself and other, potentially Jesus people.
nonJesus peep: My chips and dip are so bitchin'!
Jesus peep: My chips and dip are Jesus.
Jesus peep: Hitler is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: How is Hitler Jesus? They are two completely different people. Plus, Hitler is directly responsible for the Holocaust and death of six million Jews, not to mention at least three million non Jews.
Jesus peep: Your face is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: How is my face Jesus? I was going to get a sub from blimpie today and I got bored and made eye contact with a baby and the baby started crying and I'm almost positive it was because of my face. Also, the young woman behind the counter didn't put extra jalapenos on my sub and I'm sure it's because of my face. Then I ate my sub and asked the young girl to prom and she said no because of my face and I'm sure it's because of my face!
Jesus peep: This mirror is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: Thank you so much! My face Jesuser than a motherfucker now!
Jesus peep: My chips and dip are Jesus.
Jesus peep: Hitler is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: How is Hitler Jesus? They are two completely different people. Plus, Hitler is directly responsible for the Holocaust and death of six million Jews, not to mention at least three million non Jews.
Jesus peep: Your face is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: How is my face Jesus? I was going to get a sub from blimpie today and I got bored and made eye contact with a baby and the baby started crying and I'm almost positive it was because of my face. Also, the young woman behind the counter didn't put extra jalapenos on my sub and I'm sure it's because of my face. Then I ate my sub and asked the young girl to prom and she said no because of my face and I'm sure it's because of my face!
Jesus peep: This mirror is Jesus.
nonJesus peep: Thank you so much! My face Jesuser than a motherfucker now!
by jesuser than a mofo August 12, 2010
the Son of God and the Second Person of the Holy Trinity. Christians believe that through his crucifixion and subsequent resurrection, God offered humans salvation and eternal life.
by Ashiepatasharoni October 29, 2019
Christian: "Did you know Jesus loves you?"
Jose: "Really? Jesus, cousin, do you love me?"
Jesus: "No, I hate you."
Atheist: "I don't believe in God.
Christian: Jesus hates you. You're going to Hell when you die.
Jose: "Really? Jesus, cousin, do you love me?"
Jesus: "No, I hate you."
Atheist: "I don't believe in God.
Christian: Jesus hates you. You're going to Hell when you die.
by NickerASnicker May 31, 2018
Jesus is God
by Randon dude September 29, 2019
He is the savour of the world and the best guy to ever meet, sadly you cant meet him since he is in heaven but if you believe in him, when you die you will have eternal life in heaven with him. He created the world and then made us, wanting us to be full of the fruits of the spirit but then man kind sinned and we were separated from him. But then he came down to earth as a human and he was sacrificed on the cross ,and it must of been extremely painful, but he done it anyway because he loves us so much. So now because he sacrificed himself, when we sin we are forgiven and he will love us even when we sin and he will never love us less or more than your neighbour. You can find out alot more about this in this awesome book called the bible.
Jesus is the savour of the universe
by LovedByJesus September 30, 2018