Bed-Reading

The action of placing a book in your right hand, running full speed at your bed, jumping precisely five feet away from the mattress, completing a one hundred and eighty degree spin while simultaneously crossing the book between your legs. You then land on your back with the book open and proceed to read your story of choice.

Bed-Reading is an extreme sport, only for the elite.

by dirkdiggler12 December 4, 2016

Bed Lag

The feeling of mental unawareness of what the time of day is after a long nap.

I'm sorry I was late to the movie, I experienced some serious bed lag and thought it was only five.

by Little Buddy Diapers January 25, 2011

stabbing the bed

When a guy sleeps on his stomach and has a boner, causing said boner to stick into the mattress.

I woke up this morning with my penis hurting, I must have been stabbing the bed all night!

by Jim Throttle September 30, 2017

Bed Wench

A disrespectful term used against Black Women in relationships with non-Black Men - usually White Men which has roots in the transatlantic slave trade when White Men would rape Black Women. The term is used by Black Men who although sleep with White Women have an issue with the reverse and Black Women who are sickened by Black Women engaging with a White Man due to being conditioned to see White Men as devils

Black Man desperate for sex: *sends a White Woman, a "hi baby, want to come over" text*

*Scrolls through instagram and sees a young interracial couple involving a Black girl and her White boyfriend*

*Types "Look at this bed wench" in her comments*

*Throws phone on his dirty mattress and waits for Becky to come over*

by Eri567 May 23, 2022

Bed Rage

A sexual act occurring from pent-up sexual tension.

Sexual congress occurring as a byproduct of mental incompatibility, or repulsion.

Can be used in the past tense.

It had been too long since John or Jane had sex with each other and both were looking for some bed rage.

by CdubJ2 November 2, 2010

bed pan

See a pot to piss in

You don't have a bed pan. YEAH!

by Kung-Fu Jesus April 30, 2004

Bed Pebbles

The little shit foreign objects in your bed that dig into your torso/shoulders at night. Usually caused by eating in your bed.

"Shit, there's a bunch of bed pebbles in my bed! I shouldn't have ate those potato chips..."

by ERAUPwnsauce August 9, 2008