Customer Splaining

When a customer is trying to explain the job better than the person providing the service.

Customer Splaining: The customer, customer splained how to do my own job.

For example, a customer telling you how to make a latte, when you’ve been a barista for 5 years.

by Local barista August 8, 2023

Custom Made Canopy (COC)

Used by white 21-39-year-old DIY Blokes who have strived in life to build a canopy for the back of their 4x4 (Must be a Hilux or Ranger). Construction must be of aluminum and consist of over-the-top engineering which is sure to be useless in its first engagement with an Australian 4x4 Track. Bonus points if the vehicle is on stock suspension but the canopy has cost 20k+ and their multiple relationships to build.

"That Bloke Conrad, he loves to build his canopy but he is a bit of a Custom Made Canopy (COC) man"
"I have a custom-made canopy. No way I was paying a professional to do something I could do in 12-18 Months. No my wife didn't leave me, I left her"
"Yes my 5-month-old died from starvation, but I was working on my canopy the whole week"

by 12HT4Lyfe October 31, 2023

reverse customer

A customer that you pay, in order to try to make your company seem more popular and to seem to have more customers.

Yay, we just landed our 100th customer, unfortunately the first 99 were reverse customers...

by nixcraft@ April 30, 2009

combat custodian

Servicemen in the military that don't do anything productive except clean and do landscaping work while they wait to be trained. Duties include raking lines in sand, police calls in parking lots, and other useless chores for the military.

Private 1: I signed up to shoot shit. Why the hell am I raking sand?

Private 2: Get used to it, kid. You're a combat custodian now. Attack the ground aggressively!!!

by SteeltoedLoafers January 1, 2011

difficult customer

A polite way of calling a customer a “Cunt”

“This is a bit of a difficult customer”
Really means
“This is a MASSIVE cunt”

by Angry service worker January 6, 2018

Wholesome cuckolding

Getting sexually aroused by another man doing something wholesome and proper for your wife, while you watch.

Examples: giving flowers, buying gifts, giving hugs and comforting.

"Hey, are you going to the concert with your wife?"
"No, im letting her go with her co-worker, im gonna just go by myself and get a spot in the back row."
"You and your wholesome cuckolding, jim."

by assshorts June 4, 2018

cosmic custodian

One who sees life through a lens of universal loving kindness....and whose work is to make this love visible.

As she approached life through a lens of universal loving kindness, he truly saw her as a cosmic custodian...

by Sonder Life September 15, 2019