The Lonely Blumpkin

When one tries to suck his own cock while shitting

I tried to suck my own cock while shitting. It was the lonely blumpkin.

by metalmetalrob February 26, 2010

Country Blumpkin

The act of receiving a blumpkin while occupying an out-house.

Mary walked to the out-house and gave Joe a Country Blumpkin for his birthday.

by Spigot On HOT March 5, 2009

Thai Blumpkin

The act of getting blowjob on the toilet while suffering from travellers diarrhea.

I told her I couldn't take her home with me because that street meat was sitting right but she offered to give me a Thai Blumpkin.

by Fleshdawg October 7, 2016

Hand Blumpkin

The act of jerking off while taking a crap.

“Chick left me, and all I’m left with are hand blumpkins.”

by Witch_Devil May 11, 2023

Blumpkin Plus

It's like a regular Blumpkin (in which one is taking a shit while another person is giving them a blow job) except in the case of a Blumpkin Plus the person taking a shit is also vomiting onto the other person's head.

Bro, that chick was so nasty and probably down for a Blumpkin Plus had I been queasy enough.

by WIZARD_GOD_BRO_BABY August 5, 2021

Trumpkin Blumpkin

When you are giving a blow job to a trump look alike or trump himself, in a port-a-potty while he is taking a shit.

Dan: honey should I wear my trump get up tonight?

Susie: what for?

Dan: well since it's our anniversary I thought maybe you could finally give your dear husband a trumpkin blumpkin!

Susie: damnit Dan I told you I would blow you while dressed as trump, but I'm drawing the line at Port a potty and you taking a shit... You just ate a bean burrito for gods sake.

Dan: it's all I want for our anniversary though darling

Susie: and all I want is a new husband.

by RayRay H. September 22, 2021

cuntry blumpkin

Licking a woman's pussy to the point of orgasm while she sits on a toilet and defecates.

In a moment in evolutionary history, Skeeter thought, "My sister done blumpkin me all the time. Maybe I can do that for her." And the first cuntry blumpkin was performed...with mixed results for Skeeter got many splinters on his chin from the outhouse's wood toilet.

by onendone January 7, 2011