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Douche monkey

Douche monkey means: Someone being rude also acting very ignorant and saying or doing something uncalled for. (2) An insult or joke to use for someone you do not like or are friends with
(1)
Guy: "Hey lady you would look good in my bed."
Girl: "Go away you Douche monkey."

(2)
Girl:"My Douche monkey where have you been?"
Girl(2):"Did you just call me Douche monkey??"
Girl:"It was a jokey insult."
by Dalyena October 26, 2015
mugGet the Douche monkeymug.

Douche Canoe

Douche Canoe (noun): A self-absorbed, obnoxious individual who drifts through life on a raft of arrogance, bad takes, and an utter lack of self-awareness. Often mistaken for a human, but upon closer inspection, closely resembles a sentient, poorly groomed toe with an attitude problem because he likely sat on a pinecone.
Example: Kyle, the human embodiment of a stubbed toe, leaned back in his chair, manspreading like he was claiming land, and loudly explaining why everyone else was wrong about literally everything. Between flexing his "elite genetics" (despite looking like a swollen big toe) and hitting on anything that moved, he remained blissfully unaware that the entire room was desperately hoping for a strong gust of wind to carry his douche canoe far, far away.
by Sassenach March 14, 2025
mugGet the Douche Canoemug.

pistol douche

One whom exclusively uses the pistol in a shooter game, especially by just using it to pistol whip. Usually frowned upon by all other players, especially in the XBOX 360 game Gears of War.
In a Gears of War Match:

"That guy's being a pistol douche. He never uses any other weapon!"
by bigmax June 17, 2007
mugGet the pistol douchemug.

Douch bait

The act of making a comment in a YouTube video to draw comments from Trolls and Shills in the comment section so that they may identified and blocked.
“I said that in my video as douch bait to get the trolls to comment
by Cheeky Monkees April 13, 2019
mugGet the Douch baitmug.

douche kabob

Regarding the employment industry; a group of 4 or more people coming in to fill out an application for employment with only 1 person that speaks english.
Here comes a douche kabob, want to place bets on which one speaks english?
by Mrs. Hotits Ann Asses July 12, 2010
mugGet the douche kabobmug.

Douche Waffle

1. A Belgian waffle topped with a drizzle of the remaining contents of a douche bag.

2. That cheese dick mother fucker whom cuts you off in traffic, honks horn, drives too slow, or just plain looks like a assjacker. (i.e. Harris of kades)
Mmmm. A douche waffle sure would hit the spot right at this very moment...said nobody ever. Or, people who shoot 14 year old kids are douche waffles.
by ScottiePG.C July 13, 2016
mugGet the Douche Wafflemug.

douche bag

a complete moron that knows everything about nothing. all talk, pats himself on the back and takes credit for something he cannot do. one so full of himself and doesn't even realize it. insults other peoples intellect
My ex-boss Bruce Brower jr. Of Brower Plumbing and Heating of Trenton NJ is one of the biggest Douche bags known to man. Pretends to be connected with the Italian mob. Wears wife beater t-shirts and talks down to women. Lifts weights for his arms only with skinny legs. Pretends to know everything and threatens people with his famous words of "don't let me catch you on the street" total clown
by mr.beam June 8, 2014
mugGet the douche bagmug.

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