fandom wank

Both a noun and a verb.

1. Fannish absurdity, self importance, gratuitious grandiosity. Named for the community on journalfen.net.

2. to be the object of said community

1. Few friendships survive a good fandom wank.

2. After Mary Sue threatened to leave the Harry Potter fandom because her opus "When Harry met Mary" was laughed at, she was fandom wanked.

by minion of the Hive Vagina March 16, 2004

cheese wank

A term used to describe someone that not only is a wanker, but also a cheesy wanker. It does not mean that that person wanks off nor wanks off to cheese or with cheese. It just means that that person is a loser, douche bag, hated, etc.

Al: You know Bob from accounting? The one that kisses so much ass? He got promoted.

Jack: What?! What a fucking cheese wank. That makes me wanna T-bag him.

by Fonetix1 December 9, 2008

Wank Account

The ammount of semen held in reserve in one's testicles at any given point in time.

"I'm sorry sir. You are only allowed to make six withdrawals from your account per day"

by Vince Mincer June 15, 2005

preparatory wank

Jacking off before you get with your woman, so that you'll last longer before cumming.

I like to get in a preparatory wank before I pound my wife into the mattress, but I have to be careful or I won't be able to cum, just pump her dry pussy for an hour before giving up.

by Strokher Ace November 27, 2013

Disaster Wank

A wank that takes your mind off a disaster that has just occured, allowing you to have a clear mind to think of a solution.

1) I rolled my car last night. Hit two pedestrians and a dog.
2) Bloody hell, what did you do?!
1) I had a quick Disaster Wank then set about destroying the evidence before running off into the woods.

by Harold Bishop's Love Child March 2, 2010

Wank Mit

A mitten used to aid masturbation. Often knitted from wool. A posh alternative to the wank sock.

Available in male and female flavours.

Tobias, my mom just found one of my wank socks and put her hand inside it!", "Dude, you really need to buy a wank mit, they're washable too

by WankMit April 13, 2011

Wank Camel

When you go a long time without having a flog just like a camel would go without water.

Person 1: "I haven't masturbated in ages."

Person 2: "Whoa dude, you're such a Wank Camel."

by TeddyBazz December 9, 2015