Closet Ostrich

Closet Ostrich- an ostrich who lives in closets and wants money from you... even though you already paid the ostrich last Thursday. This term was coined by the band Fat Hands, and is from their song "Ostrich in My Closet".

"What happened to all the money you made last week?"
"I had to pay my Closet Ostrich again. He won't leave."

by treesofgreen October 29, 2017

closet fuckboy

someone who looks like a gentleman but is actually a fuckboy

"that guy looks really nice"
"hes not he is really closet fuckboy"

by sophies sh*t November 27, 2016

closet kink

A shy yet kinky person that is ready to get bent over at moments notice.(but on the DL)

Damn Sammy is a real closet kink bro

by Gg the tree October 2, 2018

closet bugger

To not disclose the fact that you are bugging out, or freaking out because of smoking the reefer.

Dude, he's probably bugging out on the inside and not telling us because he doesn't want to seem like a pussy. He's a closet bugger.

by joesbugginout November 25, 2010

closeted coward

Someone who is secretly a coward, but puts up a brave front until trouble appears.
Doesn't want to admit they are scared of a lot of things. The term goes a bit deeper into their personality than being just a "pussy" or "wuss"

ex:
Jake: Wow! That guy Shane is so cool! He said he'd take on those bullies head on!
Ashley: He says that all the time. He's actually a closeted coward. Once those bullies show up he'll run screaming.

by frostiewow July 21, 2015

Closet Retard

Someone who feigns intelligence but in actuality is no more intelligent that an average retard

John: He used ironic wrong. I think he meant coincidental.

Lisa: Ya, he's a "closet retard".

by Bytesthedust January 3, 2018

Closet mo

Closet mo,
When someone you know pretends to be, or acts straight all the while exhibiting homosexual habits or tendencies, for example making countless gay jokes to cover his own tendancies, or dating attractive women as a cover up

Our friend Tyler B. Has a hot girlfriend allison but we all know he wishes she was His boyfriend, soon she'll figure out he's a

"closet mo"

by gingerjesus January 1, 2015