An individual who has the annoying habit of making a scene outside the stall while you’re trying pop a deuce in order to get you to hurry up. Turd Burglars show up typical when you’re in public bathroom in a busy location and someone very impatient shows up and decides to interrupt your shitting session.
>You: answering nature’s call in a public bathroom like a normal person
> Turd burglar: “ Hurry up mister I need to go, I NEED TO GO!!!” X 50 on loop until you finish pushing your slimy turd
> Turd burglar: “ Hurry up mister I need to go, I NEED TO GO!!!” X 50 on loop until you finish pushing your slimy turd
by Thicke Henry Richard September 09, 2020
Someone who simply steals your poop. You could be taking a nice dump, not knowing what’s hiding in your shower, or under your sink… as soon as you stand up from the toilet and turn away for a second… your turd will be gone because the turd burglar took it. You will not catch them… nor see them.. unless they’re over 34 years of age. They are either assigned to a person at the age of 6, or placed into a house when built, and will steal everyone’s turds that ever lives there.
Frank - “Yo… I just took a shit, and when I turned around to flush… it wasn’t there”
Marlo- “oh, it was probably the turd burglar
Marlo- “oh, it was probably the turd burglar
by Stinkletoot May 27, 2024
-an individual who finds joy in sucking the joy from others.
-someone who sucks the joy away, as if taking the joy away from relieving yourself by pooping.
-to call someone a turd burglar means they ruin any enjoyable moment all the time.
-someone who sucks the joy away, as if taking the joy away from relieving yourself by pooping.
-to call someone a turd burglar means they ruin any enjoyable moment all the time.
All i wanted to do was enjoy a peaceful break from work, but my boss kept walking around the office. He's such a turd burglar.
by Bradgehog November 05, 2013
A Turd burglar is a mythical being that takes your turds (aka poop) from your toilet at night when everyone is asleep, similar to the tooth fairy legend.
Little boy: Mommy when will the turd burglar come?
Mother: oh honey the turd burglar only comes at night when your asleep.
Mother: oh honey the turd burglar only comes at night when your asleep.
by BeeftGunkle June 20, 2023
Is a Law enforcement agent that goes into your home on a SNEAK and PEAK warrant, but more than likely without one.
While riffling through your belongings BURGLAR BURGLAR will steal items of value as long as they will fit into their pockets. BURGLAR BURGLAR is a highly trained specialist. More often than not you will not notice you've be BURGLAR BURGLARED. Will work with EYE IN THE SKY, STAWKA DeAngelos, DIRTY COWARDS.
While riffling through your belongings BURGLAR BURGLAR will steal items of value as long as they will fit into their pockets. BURGLAR BURGLAR is a highly trained specialist. More often than not you will not notice you've be BURGLAR BURGLARED. Will work with EYE IN THE SKY, STAWKA DeAngelos, DIRTY COWARDS.
by reeeetaaaaad June 04, 2023
by Hagrid’s Bitch September 19, 2020
Hey dude, my girlfriend fell asleep after she blew me and I couldn’t stop myself from tasting the little bit of cum she left in the corner of her mouth. Am I a spackle burglar?
by spank-the-monkee May 29, 2018