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guidate

(gwee-date), noun - A romantic rendezvous shared between a Guido and his female counterpart, the Guidette.
"O-M-JESUS I totally saw Pauly D and Jwoww on a guidate at Johnny G's Pizza!"
by gringachinita January 2, 2010
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Guidonculous

An adjective to describe the behavior of a greaseball who may display the following:
wears too much cologne; drips hair gel, wears New York Giants/Jets/Yankees clothing; abuses steroids, rocks a large chain; ends every sentence with "bro;" asks for Jagerbombs incessantly; preys on drunk women.
"Did you see that guy with the Yankees jersey try to hook up with that wasted girl? That's guidonculous."
"That guy in the Members Only jacket is wearing a guidonculous amount of Brut cologne."
by J.Yeager January 10, 2009
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Guido Key

A keyboard button that automates typing in alternating caps and random punctuation. Like the shift key, but for lazy people.
yO bRoSkI tHiS bLaCkBeRrY sToRm hAz a GuIdO kEy BuIlT iN sO i CaN tElL a.:?Ll ThE bItChEs aBo!Ut My NeW hAiRcUt.
by WaLdO pRoMoTiOnS September 8, 2009
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guido

1. In Turin (Piedmont, NW Italy), bus chaffeurs. In Italian "guido" is a pun because it means "I drive" and is also a proper name for men. If you call a driver this way it seems like he's familiar to you. This saying is no longer very widespread.
Il guido prende rosso anche alle rotonde. Che palle.
The chaffeur gets the red traffic light at roundabouts, too. That sucks.
by Uslengh November 9, 2014
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guido

Being one from the Tri-State area, I can confirm that a Guido is a piss poor excuse for an Italian-American selling out his culture, country, and way of life. \

Commonly seen in trendy clubs/dive bars looking like half-a-fag with slicked up hair, shirts two sizes too small, popped-collars, ripped/tight jeans, and whatever else is trendy at the time, they are often dancing in the middle of the floor like a jackass while all the regular people point and laugh.
In said habitats, they are often seen drinking bitch drinks with cute umbrellas that are various colors of the rainbow, undoubtedly symbolizing their homosexuality.
Also can be described as a douchebag, among other various insults, that has an inflated sense of self worth, compounded by the IQ of someone that is legally retarded, behaving like a complete jackass in public at all times no matter how fucking retarded he may appear.
A fake, peice of shit looking bronze tan is commonly seen on these poor excuses of a human being, which adds to their ridiculous image that makes my life a hell of a lot more bearable.
Always seen in a gym, these jacked up guys actually have the balls the size of peanuts. Unable to fight a fight on their own, the rely on the fact that they travel in packs in order to intimidate those around them. When seen on their own, flight usually takes precedence when faced with a physical altercation.
If you seen one of these creatures in the wild, take cover, take pictures, and laugh. The most pathetic thing about these kids is that they actually take themselves seriously.
ex. The Gotti Brothers, those guys you see in the funny Guido videos on youtube.com.
by JasonMB September 20, 2006
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Staten Island Wanna-be Guido

Beware this special brand of Staten Island boy - he is unique in his lack of uniqueness. He wasn't "cool" enough to be accepted by the other Staten Island boys due to the fact that he's probably fat and has acne that like, stares you in the face when you encounter him. He overcompensates for everything he lacks in self confidence by guising himself in "panache" and nobility. Oft he feels he has no purpose so he goes for a civil service job, such as firefighter, EMT, or cop. It's his only means of attaining power, and he has the option to make it look like he actually cares about people when the truth is he only cares about his fat pimply self

He has sex with anything and everyone (see slut, roast beef curtains, and staten island girl)because he has a complex about not being able to be alone, ever, and being a horny bastard who craves gratification.

He has the Staten Island Accent that makes you want to scream and run in circles with an ultimate goal of sticking your head under the ground, or scream running towards his acne mounds with a pickaxe.
Elizabeth: Wow, look at that Staten Island Wanna-be Guido! He makes me sick; he's going to die alone with some sort of STD.

Maria: Oh fuck yeah. He's getting the clap, I just know it.

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Kathy: That's my partner at work. Truth is I can't stand him.

Kim: Why?

Kathy: He's such a Staten Island Wanna-be Guido; he's ugly but he's got a superiority complex up his ass.

Kim: Ooh! Shh, his girlfriend is coming. Whoa, is that a face?

Kathy: Oh, you mean his fuck buddy? Yeah, well, that unfortunate thing right around where her nose should be is called a face. He doesn't care, he'll stick his dick in anything he can persuade.
by Joanna Bannana March 19, 2008
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guidopino

"look at that 6' 3" jacked guidopino. I did not know brown could go orange. Oh he's pist fumping."
by jeR- December 21, 2009
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