Skip to main content

Elton John Marriage

Noun: A heterosexual marriage in which a gay man is attempting to mask his true sexuality.
"I didn't think Todd was gay, he has a wife and kids!"
"Nah, that was just an Elton John Marriage, he's a flaming queer."
by KewlKid5 September 14, 2014
mugGet the Elton John Marriage mug.

John Wilkes Booth

While in a movie theater you blow a load on the back of someone's head and then try to run out before you get caught.
The guy in front of me sure was pissed when I gave him a John Wilkes Booth
by snizzlewizzle May 17, 2021
mugGet the John Wilkes Booth mug.

Pull a John Preston

Pull a John Preston is the act of single-handedly fucking up a group of people in the most awesome way imaginable while using a gun/pair of guns/club/pair of clubs/katana/your bare goddamned fists. It doesn't matter what you use because you're such a badass the fight will be over in seconds leaving nothing but a circle of bodies around you.

An individual capable of pulling a John Preston is not to be fucked with. Seriously, they can shoot you without even looking at you, dodge bullets and know what you're thinking before you do.
"Man, I was at the bar last night and there was this fight that broke out. All of a sudden, some guy pulls a John Preston with a pool cue and before I know it there's, like, eight guys KO'd on the floor. It was awesome!"

"I was heading to my car to go to work and suddenly a ninja posse appears in front of me. So I pulled a John Preston on them. Wasn't even late for work."

"So, I storm into this building and there's, like, twenty guys with rifles shooting at me. I drop my M4, whip out my Berettas and pull a John Preston on them. Wonder if they'll give me a Congressional Medal of Badassery?"
by Yeret February 9, 2015
mugGet the Pull a John Preston mug.

Shut up John!!

Something you say to someone named John when they are being particularly loud and or annoying : best used by black Basketball coaches teaching history classes
John: *is loud*

Coach: Shut up John!!
by batman17007 January 27, 2019
mugGet the Shut up John!! mug.

Long John Commando

Long johns, also known as long underwear or thermal underwear , are undergarments used in cold conditions to stay warm. They are essentially tight pants, or rather, brief underwear but with legs that extend down to the ankles.
There are two schools of thought when it comes to wearing long johns.

Some guys prefer to wear them over their original brief style underwear, while others throw aside their briefs and wear the long johns directly as underwear, with nothing on underneath.
Someone wearing their pants without underwear is said to be wearing them commando .
A person that wears their long johns directly on them, without keeping their original layer of undergarment on underneath is wearing them long john commando .
Dave : ' Dude, I don't really care, but I noticed in the locker room after the hockey game that you don't wear any underwear under your long johns ... that's weird ! '

Simon : ' It's not weird, it's natural. Why would I wear underwear under my underwear? '

Dave : ' Nah man, I prefer to keep my briefs under, to avoid dirtying my long johns '

Simon: ' Different strokes for different folks, dude. I generally just WASH my long johns when they're dirty. Plus why would there be that handy flap hole for peeing if they weren't meant to be used directly as underwear? '

Dave: ' Hmmmm, good point. Think I have to try that. '

Simon: ' Sounds like you, sir, are ready to go long john commando . Welcome to the Brotherhood. There is no going back now. '
by Cyril321Go November 12, 2018
mugGet the Long John Commando mug.

John motherfuckin' Smith

Refers to one of the most unknown badasses of all time. John Smith beheaded 5 Turks, was imprisoned, killed his master, escaped, sailed to the new world, made a shitty colony a great one, jumped off of an exploding ship, suffered burn injuries, and still explored more of the new world. Often refers to the unpopular kid that actually has a shit ton of bad ass acomplishments.
"Hey, Shaun! You know the kid that sits in the corner? Well, it turns out he's a John motherfuckin' Smith! I hear he has seven Soccer MVP medals and a black belt in

Tai Kwan Do!"
by Trollabear September 11, 2014
mugGet the John motherfuckin' Smith mug.

the john cooper school

due to economy and expensive addition towards their new high class, state-of-the-art preforming arts center, now an *exclusive* preK-12 preparatory school, where parents pay $12,00 tuition a year located in The Woodlands.

known by kids at The Woodlands High School (voted the most snobbiest school in America by David Letterman) as "that snobby, smart, rich kid school"

A school where starting at the age of 10, kids first phones are iphones and droids, 14 year girls get their hair bleached and get spray tans, every single boy in the school has an xbox 360, and only top, name brand clothes are worn.

in carpool line, all you see are bmws, audis, escalades, and other ridiculously priced sports cars.

youve known everybody since kindergarten, and their parents, and their dogs.

by the 6th grade, all girls, and boys, go to professional hair salons

everyones perfect at everything, because thats coopers reputation

where soulja boy and kyle massey go to your birthday parties and you dont even care, and if you dont have a dj, you're poor

you live in carlton woods, and if you dont, well youre family is still a member

otherwise known as Hell.
a typical the john cooper school convo

G: omg you're new vintage coach purse is so cute!
A: it was only 700$
G: oh nevermind, its ugly
by feahjeavmeaop June 29, 2010
mugGet the the john cooper school mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email