1. matza (n.) Flat bread that is eaten by faithful Jews (often spelled as matzah or matzoh).
2. Matza (n.) A Jewish whore, often the daughter of a rabbi.
2. Matza (n.) A Jewish whore, often the daughter of a rabbi.
For meaning #1:
The rebbe was very pleased when his shipment of kosher matza arrived from Tel Aviv.
For meaning #2:
a)
Rabbi Goldstein: I banged Matza at the Chabad yesterday, it was very delightful.
Reb Moshe: Oh really? I heard she was offering a shabbat discount!
b)
Biology Professor: Among other things, semen contains a great deal of sugars, specifically fructose, which serves as the main source of energy for sperm
cells...
Matza: *raises hand* Professor, but if sperm contains sugar fructose, why isn't it sweet?!
*class breaks out in hysterical laughter*
Biology Professor: *irritated* That, young lady, is because the receptors for sweetness are on the tip of the tongue, and not on the back of the throat!
The rebbe was very pleased when his shipment of kosher matza arrived from Tel Aviv.
For meaning #2:
a)
Rabbi Goldstein: I banged Matza at the Chabad yesterday, it was very delightful.
Reb Moshe: Oh really? I heard she was offering a shabbat discount!
b)
Biology Professor: Among other things, semen contains a great deal of sugars, specifically fructose, which serves as the main source of energy for sperm
cells...
Matza: *raises hand* Professor, but if sperm contains sugar fructose, why isn't it sweet?!
*class breaks out in hysterical laughter*
Biology Professor: *irritated* That, young lady, is because the receptors for sweetness are on the tip of the tongue, and not on the back of the throat!
by Shlomo Scheckelgruber September 21, 2008
Get the matza mug.by ETARR October 27, 2004
Get the MATLAB mug.Related Words
matzab • matzaball • MATLAB • Mathaba • mathabo • matlab and chill • matzah • matzah daddy • matzoball • Matzoballing
Hey Abe, remember that time in Camp Habonim when we administered a matzoballing on that putz Moishe? Oi vey!
by O.G.-YaYo December 2, 2009
Get the Matzoballing mug.A phrase used by Teja Tej in the rap "Matlab is cool!" Typically used for those who want to write a code but do not know which programming language to use.
Nerd 1: "Man I wish I could write this code, but I don't know if C++ is good for this."
Nerd 2: "Matlab that code!"
Nerd 2: "Matlab that code!"
by Teja Tej March 22, 2011
Get the Matlab that code mug.A person who is a try hard. Plays sports buts thinks he or she is better than they really are. Attempts to be funny by being a general ass hole. Any person who completely hates their family and hopes they die. Someone who is a flirt. Talks lots of shit behind other peoples backs. Any person who yells and bitches about other people then freaks out when it is done to them. A person who thinks there cool because they smoke and drink. Has a huge negative connotation.
by connerandtheballers October 6, 2011
Get the Mutzaballer mug.by The Oxford dictionary associat February 2, 2018
Get the matabalism mug.A serious health issue that causes huge weight gain over time. It also causes chronic flatulence and shitting multiple times a day and heavy lead deposits in the ass causing very slow movement. This condition is often accompanied by a micro penis, heavy deposits of shit in the rear area of the underwear caused by pressurized air explosions passing by fecal matter inside the ass and an inability to reach the areas of the body the need to be cleaned after a bowl movement.
Long term side affects include,
High blood pressure
Heart attack
Swelling of the anal glands
Hemorrhoids
Herpes
hpv
HIV
Syphilis
Homosexuality
Unsatisfied sexual need that results in the patient making multiple attempts to force himself upon the same or opposite sex to satisfy those desires.
(Clinical research has not been able establish if this disease causes sexual frustration or sexual frustration occurs from the micro penis and strong odors of shit from the propelled fecal matter caking up on the buttock and underwear with each movement)
Long term side affects include,
High blood pressure
Heart attack
Swelling of the anal glands
Hemorrhoids
Herpes
hpv
HIV
Syphilis
Homosexuality
Unsatisfied sexual need that results in the patient making multiple attempts to force himself upon the same or opposite sex to satisfy those desires.
(Clinical research has not been able establish if this disease causes sexual frustration or sexual frustration occurs from the micro penis and strong odors of shit from the propelled fecal matter caking up on the buttock and underwear with each movement)
Chris: hey Jeff will you please watch over my family after I’m gone?
Jeff: WTF?
Chris: I was diagnosed with mattabolism. I’m gonna take a 12 gauge and blow my fucking brains out.
Jeff: o shit!!!! Yea I will buddy I understand. If you puss out I’ll do it for you. So you don’t have to suffer.
Jake: I overheard........... So can I fuck your wife after your gone?
Chris: well FUCK YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jeff: WTF?
Chris: I was diagnosed with mattabolism. I’m gonna take a 12 gauge and blow my fucking brains out.
Jeff: o shit!!!! Yea I will buddy I understand. If you puss out I’ll do it for you. So you don’t have to suffer.
Jake: I overheard........... So can I fuck your wife after your gone?
Chris: well FUCK YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!
by Iphistagash February 23, 2020
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