bait-and-switch baby

Your friend's children who are so well behaved and perfect, it lulls you into thinking parenthood is easy and into having one of your own-- which will inevitably be very, very misbehaved.
Don't let Larry and Rory's new bait-and-switch baby fool you, you're not ready to have kids!
by photojenna June 30, 2008
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the ol bait n switch

One has to sit on a tree branch about 11 1/2 feet high. Any higher is dangerous, and any lower will result in a failure of the deed. Once one pulls their pants down, and is ready for the act one has to proceed to poop. Immediately, without hesitation, one has to fall off the back end of the branch, backflipping, and in turn landing on the ground flat on their back. At which point the poop impacts with one's chest. This form of self-masturbation takes many years of experience and should not be perfomed by an amateur. The branch can be substituted with any form of a bar up in the air.
Johnny: How'd you break your neck?

Fred: I did the ol bait n switch from a branch that was too high!

Johnny: Haha, they warn you shouldn't do that!
by Metal Dan does Metal Dan February 23, 2011
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Master Bait N' Switch

When at an Asian Massage Parlor (AMP), hoping for a Happy Ending (ie: someone else will Master Bait you!) and they switch Masseusses on you. You start off with "Rub Mi Ping" the 23yr old Chinese gymnist, and once she sees you are "up" for it, sez she'll be right back. In comes Dragon Lady, 45+yrs old, to "upsell" you a Hand Job. Unless you want to walk out with a 2x4 in your pants and a set of Blue Balls glowing in the dark, you give in, soiling the sheets and your soul!
(at least for an hour, then you're horny again!!)
Guy1: That AMP has some fine lookin' Masseusses but they pull the Master Bait N' Switch on you!

Guy2: WTF? No way!!

Guy1: Yeah, a tight little Korean had my Timber all that, then they switched in Granny Oakley at the end to finish me off.

Guy2: STFU I'm gonna Blow my lunch!
by Touched Fondly February 5, 2007
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The act of jerking off into an ice-fishing hole while pooping into a beer can.
We went out to the shack on the lake today, and we got so drunk that one of us pulled the ol' Wisconsin Bait 'n' Switch.

We were so ashamed.
by Thwacko September 13, 2010
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Bait & Switch

A sexual maneuver used during foreplay. While lying on top of a woman, a man slithers his lower body area towards a woman’s chest area, neck, and chin. At this point the woman can take the bait, his penis, resulting in a blow job, or she can accept the switch: a forced titty fucking
While hooking up with this skank last night, I used the Bait & Switch, which unfortunately resulted in a Pasadena Mudslide
by AK27 January 4, 2008
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Bait and Switch

A form of humor where the audience expects something obvious to happen, but then something else happens/appears out of nowhere.
Bait and Switch Example:

(ASDF)

Bully: "Hey, you four-eyed freak!"

Guy with glasses: "Ah..."

(The screen zooms out, revealing a third person; a midget who LITERALLY has four eyes)

"...Don't listen to him!"

(The guy with four eyes screeches at him)
by Ubeenbamboozledson March 8, 2022
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